Last month was the toughest month i have went thru in years . Some of it was because i try to cross bridges before i needed to and i NEVER DO THAT but i done it out of fear of totally losing my eyesight . It's not a valley i would want to see anyone go thru but God has help me and yesterday on the computer when i checked out a site here this is what it said. I WOULD RATHER WALK IN DARKNESS WITH GOD THAN WALK IN THE LIGHT ALONE . That calmed my soul and help me more than you can ever imagine. This month i am going to take more time for me to draw read take naps cross stitch and whatever else i think will make me happy ! Sound selfish probably is but i always put others needs first and probably will do that alot this month because thats just me ! I feel if i can't do something or say something to someone to lighten their load today my day is wasted . God put us here to help each other to carry each others loads in anyway we can . Last year i had a friend 52 that had sepice he lost his hand up past his wrist a foot part of his leg up to his knee ; several fingers down to the first nuckle most of his thumb and the toes off his other foot and most of the ball of his foot. During this he gave his heart and life to Jesus and said it was worth it all ! When the church was going thru this with this young man i think everyone of us ask ourself could i go thru this and still keep fighting to live ? Would i want to live all chopped up like that ? Friends God won't give us the grace we need to carry a load till we have to walk thru that valley . I use to tell my step daughter i am a go getter i know i could live by myself as long as i could crawl to the microwave ! Well last month i was saying to myself WHAT IF I CAN'T SEE A MICROWAVE ? Always remember GOD WON'T ALLOW MORE ON US THAN WE CAN BARE ! That young man that had septic they had a benifit to help him get the money together to help with the expenses over the last 8 months with not being able to work and his wife where she worked several people gave their vacation pay to her to help and worked in her place so she could be with him . When i was just sick over this thinking HOW COULD THINGS BE WORSE ? A 20 year old girl with no arms or legs spoke at this benefit that septic had taken them from her . 20 years old ! Then i thought wow that could have happen to this young man at 20 but it didn't he is 52. I realized then wow she could have been born that way . but she got to be 20 ! GET THE IDEA ! We got to learn to praise the Lord during the good and bad and be thankful for what we have. The doctor said this iritus could take the rest of my sight and noone wants to go thru that but you know what I GOT TO BE 61 AND GOD WILL BE WITH ME HE WILL NEVER LEAVE OR FORSAKE ME . If it doesn't happen PRAISE THE LORD ! I KNOW I AM A BETTER CHRISTIAN FROM GOING THRU THIS TRIAL AND APPRECIATE LIFE SO MUCH MORE ! HAVE A GREAT DAY !