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    KARVY09   39,391
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Pressure

Friday, August 03, 2012

Right now, I'm feeling insane amounts of pressure. Pressure to be a great mom, pressure to still work and bring in some money despite being a full-time caregiver (until September), pressure with deadlines and clients who want me to be 100% there all the time despite my being a full-time mom for another month. Pressure from family to visit and take care of their needs. Pressure from aforementioned family members to stay at home when I NEED TIME TO WORK and there is no other option but to put Keira in daycare three days a week. Pressure to get up to 13 miles in just about 8 weeks now when 4 miles is a struggle. Pressure to get this weight off when it just doesn't wanna.

So the accountability challenge isn't working for me, sadly. I could say I'm a failure, and sure, that's accurate in some sense, but something has gotta give and for me it's being so strict and harsh with myself.

The goal now?

Run 3x a week, don't eat so much junk, don't drink during the week, drink lots of water, and try to remain calm and positive.

That's all I can do...
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TARANITUP 8/15/2012 2:58PM

    I think you're so smart to reevaluate and downgrade some goals to make them more manageable. Let's face it - goals are added stressors and when you are trying to do something for your health, stressing yourself out more is not helping. You'll find your balance!

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4EVERADONEGIRL 8/15/2012 2:13PM

    We have to take care of ourselves and sometimes that means getting rid of the "extra" stuff. Glad you are focusing on relieving the pressure!!!

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SEEHOLZ 8/6/2012 1:02PM

    I believe 100% that taking the pressure OFF as much as possible is the BEST favor you can do for yourself! Take care of yourself!

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NANASAMM 8/6/2012 12:00PM

    Pressure and obligations happen but, you are doing the right thing...focusing on what you can and letting some things go. Good luck!
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NIELSENSLADY 8/6/2012 1:16AM

    Ugh! I can relate on the mom thing. I'm freaking sick of people telling me what I should be or should have been doing with my kid. I'm like BTFO already. LOL. I'm not good a prioritizing my time at all. You're very well organized though. You find that path that feels most comfortable and stick with that. Its tough to wear lots of hats but I know you can do it!!!

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GAELENEC 8/5/2012 1:59PM

    yep. It's time to be gentle and loving with yourself.

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LEAN-N-LEXY 8/4/2012 9:19AM

    Peace and calm wishes to you.
Enjoy the baby laughs as much as you can, they are great pressure relievers.

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LISSOME 8/3/2012 8:01PM

    Oh hon, I hear you. I think that is an excellent plan. There will plenty of time in the near future to bang out ALL the goals. Do what is necessary and most fulfilling right now and to hell with the rest.

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MANLEYSANDY 8/3/2012 7:09PM

    Those kiddos change your life! Just take it one day at time.... emoticon

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ABETTERCHERYL 8/3/2012 6:54PM

    Sounds like a much better plan given the circumstances! Hugs!

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SNEVIL1 8/3/2012 3:19PM

    Doing what you can do at this moment is a perfect plan! Doing something is better than quitting. Is the pressure to do 13 miles because you are signed up for a race?? I am signed up for a half marathon in Oct, but can only walk/run 6 right now. However, I know that I can walk 13 miles if I want to, so regardless I WILL finish that race. There are so many more opportunities for future races and to improve times. Participating in the race will be a huge first for me, so that's my current goal. Give what you can to each area of your life, but make sure to leave some room for yourself. If you are out of commission then nothing on that list gets done. Hang in there:) You're doing great.

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STSCOTT11 8/3/2012 3:17PM

    I think if you look it it as YOU HAVE CONTROL OVER THIS SITUATION...and go about figuring out ways to organize your time, politely BOW OUT of requests, demands etc...things will ease up for you.
I think sometimes it is not easy to say NO...and that can increase pressure cause you don't want to disappoint or anger the very people who help you make a living.
Nonetheless they have to know your busy too...RESPECT how you choose to manage YOUR HOME & TIME after working hours...
It might be a little uncomfortable...but if you go about sharing what YOUR PRIORITIES ARE outside of any request...and just tell them your doing this and that...they will KNOW you don't have time to take on EVEN MORE TIME with their kids and all their requests.
Another polite way of doing things is opening yourself up ONLY ONCE A MONTH for it. THAT will let them know your NOT AVAILABLE any other time.
I was feeling pressure about my weight loss goals. At one point emotionally I was being DRAINED. The only thing I knew to do was to...take a rest and HOPE I would gain some motivation and strength to keep going. I didn't stop everything, not suggeseting you ever do, but what I did was put things IN PERSPECTIVE.
I realized I was asking too much of myself.
In theory it all sound good...but in reality I couldn't do it.
What did I do? I gave myself TILL THE END OF THE YEAR.
That relieved the pressure RIGHT AWAY. I KNOW I can lose -20 lbs. by December 31st. (Hooray!)
I went in and started deleting groups I was in that I didn't participate in.
I reeled in some of MY LINES...I am always trying to encourage OTHERS...but many of those people don't even say thank you. I decreased sending messages...and for some stopped all together.
I put things in a different PRIORITY. I started focusing on NUTRITION MORE and remained CONSISTENT with exercise. THAT REALLY WORKS!!!!

Don't get me wrong...I am not criticizing but sharing my own experiences with feeling pressure. Okay.

I believe we all go through phases in different areas of life along the way where we feel pressured...and rightfully so. But I also believe sometimes it is self imposed. There is room to change those feelings...not always easy to do but it is well worth it.
Hope that all makes sense.
GOOD LUCK!

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ROCKMAN6797 8/3/2012 2:33PM

    Good for you for realizing that you need to refocus your goals to fit what you can actually do! Don't let the pressure stop you from being an awesome mom to your daughter, that, IMO, is the most important task you are faced with!

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HOPEFULHIPPO 8/3/2012 1:49PM

    No pressure!

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KITHKINCAID 8/3/2012 1:46PM

    Hey sweetie - I was feeling the same thing (without the kid - so you got me there, and you're amazing for it). So I stopped tracking. It's not a failure, it's just an admission that it was driving me crazy trying to lose weight that is JUST NOT COMING OFF while training for the marathon. I had to prioritize, figure out what was more important, and just do what I can. And right now that for me is marathon training, maintaining, and living my life with a few small indulgences here and there. I'm running a freaking marathon. I shouldn't have to be so worried about food. As long as my body continues to respond positively to the training, I'll get back to worrying about the weight loss later when I'm not a running super-star :)

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MAMADELIGHT 8/3/2012 11:31AM

    No pressure from me on the 13 miles part. Sometimes you just need to drop a ball to keep juggling.

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LIGHTNINGRUNNER 8/3/2012 11:24AM

    emoticon

You need to either ask these people you feel are pressuring you to do more for help. Or just say I have my priorities and I will do the most important thing first and will fit the next level in as there is time.

Baby Steps.

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NATPLUMMER 8/3/2012 11:13AM

    emoticon
Sounds like a fabulous plan to me.

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THE_NEW_MELISSA 8/3/2012 10:56AM

    That plan sounds perfect. Do what you can. You're an amazing mom, it's ok if things aren't 100% perfect in your eyes. Nothing ever will be. Take a moment and breathe when you need to. People depend on you and you're no good to anybody if you're not taking care of yourself first. *hugs*

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GETFIT2LIVE 8/3/2012 10:51AM

    Nothing wrong with making adjustments based on what is going on in life at the moment; that's not failure, that's simply reality. Do what you need to in order to take care of yourself and your little girl and hubby; keeping it simple and taking it one day at a time is a healthy way to handle a high pressure time. We're rooting for you!

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LAURIETAIT 8/3/2012 10:41AM

    You have the right idea. Don't feel guilty about the things you have to defer for a later date. Just make sure that you make time for yourself. Take care.


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FROGGERHKC 8/3/2012 10:17AM

    It's hard when there is so much going on. Your plan sounds like a good one! When you have more time, you will get back into things more, but for now, you are doing what you need to do to get through and there's nothing wrong with that! Hugs lady!

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CHICAT63 8/3/2012 9:52AM

    First, breathe in and out my friend ! The only person you should please is yourself and the little family of course:). But I totally understand the pressures....you do what is best for you:) emoticon

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MBSHAZZER 8/3/2012 9:30AM

    Kristina, I feel ya!! It's better to identify the things that you can let go and just focus on giving 100% (or 90%) to the things that you can tackle. One thing that everyone has to deal with is that there are only 24 hours in a day.

Hang in there!

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THEANGRYGNOME 8/3/2012 9:20AM

    Sounds like a good plan to me. emoticon

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CREATINGAMANDA 8/3/2012 8:51AM

    I can't imagine having all of this pressure - you're my hero. If you lived up here you'd still be on mat leave (we get a year) so I can't imagine how hard it must be to deal with work on top of everything else.

Just do what you can do, my friend.

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BROWREN 8/3/2012 8:09AM

    emoticon

You can only do what you can do. You have to figure out what is right for you and for your immediate family. They are what matter. Everything else is secondary and other people's opinions do not matter. You will find a balance that works for your unique situation. And remember it is okay to say 'No'

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WANT2BEFIT10 8/3/2012 7:59AM

    Sounds like you have a plan, don't forget to take time for you!

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TELFERS01 8/3/2012 7:57AM

  You go!

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