Thursday, August 02, 2012
Yesterday was my one year anniversary since really setting out to "do" SparkPeople. I am annoyed with myself that I have not only lost more weight, but have actually regained about 10 pounds that I had lost by last winter. That is really the only downside, though.
The good news:
1. I have found I actually enjoy exercising when I can play on the machines at the gym, and I am not feeling intimidated by the other people at the gym. Part of that is that a lot of them are my age and shape, and part of it is that I did the three sessions with a personal trainer so I now know how to use the machines correctly and what a "program" really looks like. An unexpected bonus: Even the "jocks" recognize me and speak, like they recognize me as someone who shares their value of a healthy body.
2. My arthritis isn't gone, but it certainly bothers me and restricts me less than it did a year ago. That means I can do a lot of things that I couldn't just a year ago. Yeah!!
3. Eating continues to be a major challenge, but even when I am overeating now, I eat less than I have in the past. My "binges" are one bag of Cheetos or one candy bar, not everything in the house. And, since I am watching the calories and fat content on foods, many things I would have bought in the past stay on the store shelf.
4. Having other people say, "You've lost weight, haven't you?" feels really, really good.
5. My A1C (a measurement of blood glucose over the last three months) has dropped significantly in the last year. It has dropped from an average of about 145 to an average of about 130 (normal for a non-diabetic is between 80 and 110 at this particular lab). That means that I am at significantly less risk of diabetic complications (blindness, kidney failure, heart disease and stroke, loss of a foot or leg, unremitting pain in the feet.... and on and on). It also means that I will probably not need insulin in the near future, and if I can get myself to control the food and lose more weight---I might meet my goal of getting off my diabetic pills completely for a least a few years.
6. And perhaps the best news of all: I am still here a year later. I don't think I have ever made it on a diet more than three or four months in the past. A lot of the reason I am still here is all of you. For the first time, I feel as if there are other people out there with the same bad habits I have and have been ashamed of for years, and are also working on them openly and honestly. That means that I can be open and honest about what I am really doing. When I go on a binge, I can admit it, and admit that I feel badly about it, and about my own lack of will-power. The trackers also help. I find that I am proud of my fitness tracker building up the minutes, and the "trophies" each month are an open announcement of my committment to changing this time. The food trackers help, too. It is hard to tell myself I haven't really over eaten by all that much when it is right there in black and white.
My goals for next year:
1. Lose at least another 30 pounds. I know that doesn't sound like much, but I am starting to recognize my own limitations. I need to stay just below maintenance, or I just plain don't stick to it.
2. Continue to do at least some exercise at least five days a week. Time is still a big issue here. Oh, well. I can retire in a couple more years, and will be able to have more time for the things I need and want to do.
3. Speaking of work, I am going to find a way to NOT be stressed by this non-job I am doing. I have conceded that at my age nobody is going to hire me, even in-house. Doesn't make sense, since a younger person may well move on in the next two years, but that is obviously how it works. I will NOT spend time being depressed about something that can't be helped. I promise myself.
So, thanks to all of you for being here for me, and saying what needs to be said when I need to hear it.