Wednesday, August 01, 2012
Remember when you were 8 and the week before school started was an exciting time of buying new clothes, acquiring fresh notebooks and school supplies, and barely sleeping in eager anticipation of seeing your friends in mass? Fast forward only a few short years to high school, and that week of bliss morphs into a week of anxiety over summer reading lists, social networking quarrels, and an end to your freedom. Fast forward even further into adulthood, and if you are a teacher, this time can bring with it a host of new fears. Anxiety dreams leading you to believe you have miscalculated the start of the school day rouse you at 3 AM only to leave you in a sweaty summer mess in your bed with racing thoughts. Sleep for me this week is futile. Avoiding stress is futile. And, the other unfortunate futile effort is my emotional eating to cope.
Yesterday, I had a low day. Conversations on our school email about strikes and scheduling chaos left me in quite a funk in the early afternoon. Lunchtime was my only respite. Without scheduled workouts and appointments later in the afternoon, I unfortunately turned to my old friend: food. Nothing even too appealing, but it didnít matter. I immediately finished feeling bloated, guilty, and even more depressed than when I started. I will not let this pre-school year anxiety undo all of my good work from the year. Yesterday was just one day. Today is the rest of my life, still!
Off to yoga, work meeting with colleagues, and an afternoon run.