I'm finding that I am fighting to get my groove back. I'm not sure about some of you but after I put my weight on I did NOT want sex. (Well I did, but not with anyone with eyes.) lol! I did not feel sexy. I did not want my husband to look at me or touch my stomach, etc. I feel bad because to be honest, (Beware TMI), I only gave it up when when necessary to keep him happy.
But I want to feel sexy again. I want to want sex again. I want to feel good and not cringe if he touches my stomach. I don't want to have to hurry and hide if he happens to walk by the bathroom after I get out of the shower.
And I'm getting there. I'm slowly but surely fighting to get there. I haven't lost all of my weight and most of what's left is in my stomach but I'm trying to focus on the areas that I also felt bad about that are looking pretty good. :) Like my arms. I'm FINALLY starting to feel comfortable enough to wear a sleeveless top! Gasp! I still have flobby (as my youngest would say) arms, but just a tiny bit compared to what they were before. I'm getting there!
And then there are my legs and butt.. :) I can wear fitting clothes now and feel really good about myself.
AND I am starting to try and do other things like take better care of my eye brows and shave my legs a little more often. Things like that that I had let slide for so long because I didn't want to turn anyone on anyways.
It's funny, I spent so long with my head down and inside of my shell hoping not to be noticed because then they'll see I'm fat.. and now I'm walking with my head high and thinking everybody should be turned on when I walk by. lol!!!
I just still need to work on the being touched with out cringing thing. I'll get there. :)
Time to weigh in!
December 12th HW- 205
January 12th GW- 195 DONE!
February 12th GW- 187 DONE!
March 12th GW- 180 DONE!
April 12th GW- 172 DONE!
May 12th GW- 165 DONE!
June 12th GW- 157 DONE!
July 12th GW- 150 DONE! On July 14th, but close enough!
Yesterday's Weight: 148
TODAY'S WEIGHT: 147.8
August 12th GW- 145
September 12th GW- 142
October 12th GW- 139
November 12th GW- 137
December 12th GW- 134
TOTAL WEIGHT LOSS TO DATE: 57.2 POUNDS!!!
THIS WEEK'S CHALLENGES!!!
Sunday: DAY OFF!! DONE!
Monday: Cardio & ST!! I did the Cardio part!
Tuesday: Cardio!! DONE! ZUMBA!
Wednesday: Cardio & ST!! DONE!! ZUMBA TONING!!
Thursday: Cardio!! NOT DONE!! I planned on doing the treadmill but then never got around to it. :(
Friday: Cardio & ST!!