Torn and Nervous
Wednesday, July 18, 2012
Last night I got into a fight with a close guy friend of mine. I’m pretty upset about it, to be honest.
To make a long story straight, we were supposed to have lunch today, but last night around midnight he decided to get all weird about the fact we were going alone because he didn’t want to appear to be cheating on his girlfriend. Then I was upset because he could have said something earlier, and have then provided his own chaperone person considering I was going to be driving an hour to meet him. And to top it off, he and his girlfriend have been dating since November. It’s July. I consider him a close friend and have gone out of my way to include her in group plans and to possible double up with the. . .to no avail. I’ve never met her. He keeps making excuses for her like she’s super shy and stuff like that, but I’m just like whatever. It doesn’t even matter anymore. I canceled lunch on him because I was getting the vibe that he really didn’t want to meet with me, and plus, if he was really that uncomfortable having lunch with me in a public restaurant in broad daylight at a peak hour because that might be cheating, well, I wasn’t going to put him in that situation. Maybe it doesn’t sound like a big deal, and maybe it’s not. I’m just sad about it. I just wanted to say bye to my friend before I move about six hours and a tristate drive away. But that’s fine. I’m not a whore, and I won’t have someone thinking her boyfriend is cheating on her with me—because I don’t do that stuff.
Anyway, along the lines of fitness. . .I’ve been eating fine since I got back. Rode 8.5 miles on the bike path today.
Been thinking a lot about the 5k Saturday. I’ve put so much into this. I guess it’s hard to explain, but I feel like I need this just to be back to who I was before the car accident. There’s a lot of emotions tied up in it. Which is why I didn’t run again today. . .with the 100*F heat, I just knew it wasn’t a good idea. I waited until later in the day when it would be cooler (but still 96*F) and then rode my bike. This means so much to me and I don’t want to mess it up.