Skinny Friends and Hiding Weight Loss

Thursday, July 12, 2012

I am spending the summer away from all my friends, and I'm surrounded by (crazy) old ladies. My one (new) friend here with me is a tall, skinny, athletic, and about my age. Since we've been living in eachothers' pockets for the past month and a half, she knows that I workout every night and has seen that I eat pretty healthy stuff for the most part.

I love her to death, but the girl eats absolute crap a lot of the time. She's professed to putting on a couple pounds since I've met her; considering the huge bowls of ice cream, constant cookie consumption, and excessive amounts of mac and cheese, I'm not really surprised. I wouldn't usually care what she was eating, except that she always ends up pushing me into eating that, too. Last night there was ice cream available, and she told me, "We're getting the big bowls," then proceeded to pick up two of said bowls and hand one to me. Now, I'm rather shy and non-confrontational, so I just went with it.

I realize that I need to just learn to tell her "no, thanks," but it's really hard! I always feel like I should hide that I'm trying to lose weight. I tell people I'm "going to watch tv" when I'm really going to prop my laptop on the treadmill and watch Netflix while walking/running. When others ask why I'm just eating fruit and a couple crackers instead of a piece of the office birthday cake, I tell them I dislike cake - totally untrue, but it keeps them from pushing food on me constantly!

Don't even get me started on how often people want me to go out drinking. Good thing they always appreciate a DD, because I'm so not blowing my diet on a beer gut.

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Anyways, speaking of hiding the fact that I'm losing weight: I've found myself recently trying to hide actual weight loss. I don't want people to notice anything different until I'm at or near my fitness goal.

When I was in high school, I tried losing weight. I was a stupid teenager, so I did not do it in a particularly healthy way, but it was working nonetheless. Unfortunately, the holidays came up, and I saw my relatives. One group of them in particular is very outspoken and rather nosy and tactless, so they all nagged at me about my weight, tried to persuade me to eat more, and just generally "affectionately" teased me. My grandma even asked me if I'd stopped eating altogether!

I just got sick of it all and decided to scrap the whole diet. I started to eat to make myself feel better, and before I knew it, I was back up to my high weight.

I don't want that to happen again, so I don't want people to see and comment on my weight loss. Thus, doing interesting things with clothing. I haven't lost that much yet, only about 10 pounds, but I have a large amount of camisoles/tanks/leggings that I can use to layer under my clothes when they get noticeably too big.

This will also probably save money in the long run, since I won't have to buy as many intermediate sizes of clothes. That's one good thing about this whole weird predicament!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Hey there, I'm happy that you've been working so hard towards your goals. I totally understand how our friends and loved ones can unknowingly (or in the worst cases knowingly) contribute to our weight issues. My mother loves me and tries to show it by giving me massive portions when I see her, I now have to stick to my guns and serve myself. I have friends who like to poke fun at me when I get a salad or whatever instead of a triple-decker burger of death, but I'll say something like "I don't see you paying the bill" or if they ARE treating, I tell them that I feel like trying something new. In the end I wouldn't really be ashamed when people notice your weight loss. Just politely say thank you, maybe say something nice about then, and then move onto the next subject.

    Keep up the good work!
    2044 days ago
    I completely agree with you that I don't like telling people that I'm trying to lose weight, I don't know what it is, but to tell someone that you are is like admitting to them that you know that you are overweight, which brings on feelings of shame. I suppose that's something worth exploring. But I will tell people that I don't want ice cream or something and they just say "oh, are you on a diet?" and I respond with "no, I just don't eat that stuff" or something - which is true. This isn't a "diet", it is a lifestyle change, and a pledge to be healthy and eat properly.
    2046 days ago
    I also think you should be up front about it. I find that if people see my dedication to what I'm doing they are supportive rather than teasing. For example, every day that I exercise I put how many calories I burnt that day on my facebook page. My family and friends leave me motivational comments and I'm even finding that they have more choices of things that I'm able to eat on my diet when I visit them. I even got brave and put how much weight I've lost on fb the other day.... I couldn't believe the support I received from people even though I've still got 38 lbs to lose.

    I understand the feeling of wanting to hide though. I don't plan on having anymore pictures of myself up until I hit my goal weight (and I'm in a bikini!) so that people can have a wow for me :D

    You can do it!!! :D
    2047 days ago
  • MIRAGE727
    Great blog, Liz!
    Since I came to SP, I've just said that I'm just transitioning to a healthy lifestyle. I never use the "D word." I save that for all the BS diets!
    Even now, when others ask me how I did it, I just said I've embraced running and focus on clean fuel!
    I've blogged on this in the past. "I define who I will be!" I love when young people (I can't believe I just said that!) realize they want to live a healthy lifestyle! I wasted 40 years but am gaining years lost back! I just let people talk!

    Stay strong, be well, and know you're never alone on this journey! Keep rockin'!
    2049 days ago
    I think I would be upfront and honest about my weight loss if I were you. Just tell them you are trying to eat healthier and stay healthy for the long term As long as your weight loss is a healthy amount for your body size, I wouldn't worry what folks say. However, don't let anyone talk you into anything you don't want to do. I have faith in you! You can do this weight loss thing and get healthy. Do it for yourself and don't worry too much what others say as long as you are doing it the healthy way!!!! No reason to hide it. Go for it girl. Best of luck. emoticon
    2050 days ago
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