No specific theme for my entry. Just need an outlet so I am not giving in to my desire to gorge myself on unhealthy foods. Don't know why I am feeling this way, just craving anything and everything sweet and it's been so hot that I would love to feel the burn I get in my throat when I take a drink of high fructose carbonation. Been over three months since I've had a soda and haven't craved it much until now. Good thing I keep it out of the house.

I'm trying to get past a 10 pound mark. My body has such a hard time with them, every 10 pounds. Once I get past it, I lost weight quickly. But once it gets near that mark, the weight doesn't want to come off. It's frustrating. So close to losing 30 pounds and being under 200. But I don't think I'll get there this week. I know that is part of my problem with want to cheat/gorge/pig out/etc. I should start keeping track of the times when this happens. That way I'll know if it's hormonal even though I don't have a "that time of the month" or if it is mental like when I feel it's not working and I'll NEVER get past this 10 pound mark.

It's been a month since I've written but I've wanted to so many times. I just never made the time to do it. So many things that I think about and think that I want to write about it so that I remember them. Little accomplishments that make me feel good. But now that I've sat down, I don't remember them. I need to carry a little notebook with me so I can randomly jot things down.

I do remember how excited I was when my whole upper arm moved when I flexed my muscles. I do remember my son's words and he was squeezing my arm and I suddenly flexed. He was in the middle of a sentence when I did and he was like "HOLY COW". Now he's always trying to squeeze my arm.

I wish I would remember more of what I wanted to write about. Maybe if I did, when I feel like this, it will be easier to snap out of it. Tomorrow starts week 4 of our P90X/Insanity hybrid. Mainly Insanity for the week. Going to do that in the morning and load some concrete in the evening. My attitude will be better tomorrow. I have a plan and I'm sticking to it.