Tuesday, July 10, 2012
I had a breakdown last week. Not the "I am so stressed, life sucks" type of breakdown, but the type where you realize that you CANNOT do anymore, you cannot add one more thing to your plate or that crack is going to cause a deafening shatter.
As some of you know, I lead a chaotic life. Work, school, kids, husband, kid's activities, etc... I have taken the back burner for far too long. What has this accomplished? Nothing. I am tired, crabby, look horrible and I have made horrible choices nutrition wise. I managed to gain back all of the weight I fought to lose. As if that isn't bad enough, the feeling of defeat has taken over. I know it's time for some serious re-vamping.
I am still up in the air about my fall semester. I am currently enrolled for 12 credits. I am debating whether or not to take the semester off. With work and a family, school has been pretty stressful. I think my body has had it! I have permanent dark circles under my eyes and let me tell you how sick I am of hearing "you look tired today! " from at least one co-worker during the day...I know I look tired, I FEEL tired too!
I have started to work out again. NOT crazy like I was....but my goal is SOMETHING every day. I still have summer semester to finish up, so time is limited, but I have to start somewhere.
My mini goals (goals that should be easy to instill, at least I hope!)
Fit in Fitness
Get more sleep
Set a better example for my children
Try to avoid the pressures of losing weight quickly and remember slow and steady wins the race!
I think my biggest problem is I am 150% dedicated at first and then I fizzle out...maybe I need to just be 90% dedicated consistantly. I don't know, but I DO KNOW that I have to keep trying.