Ok, so I am at work right now... so this blog won't be full of pictures of me, but please bare with me.
As I read all of your
comments from my latest blogs, I wanted to tell you that I am so happy that you all get motivated and inspired through my words, experiences and the commitment that I share with all of you. I think it totally rocks!
In this blog, I want to tell you what really motivates ME!
First and foremost, there is nothing more motivating then the second after I complete my bootcamp-style workouts with my trainer. It's in that moment where sweat is dripping from me in places that SparkPeople won't let me talk about
and all those normal sweat places ... haha.
So visualize it... I am 340 pounds of outrageous sweating
I am gasping for air... my lungs are fighting to push against the fat surrounding them in order to get air into my body...
Then something magical happens: I realize that I am not dead!
I realize that it sounds ridiculous, but here's the thing -- When I workout to my full potential, my mind is SCREAMING at me the entire time! It's telling me so many things like:
-You can't do that, you're FAT!
-Who are you trying to impress?
-Your legs are going to fall off if you do that again!
-You can't breathe, you are dead!
-This is not normal, no way, not normal!
-Your trainer is trying to KILL YOU!
And it just continues! The whole time my body is in gear, my brain is NOT happy about it!
But in that second right as I finish the workout, and I realize that I am NOT dead, my brain looks over my body and a funny thing called CONFIDENCE peers out and sticks its tounge out at my brain!
Even though I just pushed myself to the limit, maybe I even fell off the step because I got a little carried away with myself... I did it. And it makes me want to do it again! It makes me CRAVE my next workout. It's my personal drug of choice!
Then a funny thing happens... Life gets in the way of the workout and suddenly you forget how great the first post-workout second feels. This is exactly how I fall off the wagon each and every time.
The same occurence happens with
motivation too! When I finished my Color Run in Chicago (see my last blog), I was on such a high that I wanted to do it all over again! The pain of every step was gone and I just felt the adrenaline pumping from the accomplishment I had.
I was ready to do a
a day... just to get my skills better. I talked to friends and we discussed planning times to meet up and 5K away...
Then life got in the way. Birthday parties and vacations trumped fitness and food replaced workouts.
What is going to make this time different?
I have so many things going for me this time around. Because of all of you, I have an entire COMMUNITY of people that I need to talk with... to check in with.
The reason I started training with a personal trainer to begin with was the commitment. I am the kind of girl that doesn't miss an appointment. Knowing I am messing up someone else's day by not showing up makes me show up... even on my worst days.
The same goes for all of you... if I suddenly float off into the abyss, I hope that you all seek me out. I will do the same for anyone who asks me to! I know how that workout feels, and I know you do too.
That's all for me today, I'll check back in AFTER my workout tonight!
Because it's one more step I have to take in order to BECOME Holly!