For those of you who follow my blogs know that I am an insane pessimistic. I have been yo-yo dieting for about a year now with nothing to show for it except a shelf full of work out dvd's, health and weight loss books and a trash can full of tissues from the tears of feeling completely hopeless.
We all know the feeling of not wanting to change. Afraid to fail I like to call it. It comes to a point when you are right in the middle of a cross roads when a voice in your head says " this way to better health and feeling great... or this way to just stay in the same plus size jeans and cover yourself with light sweaters in 100 degree heat". There have been many times when I have gone to the healthy side and let me tell you its a long walk to the finish!!! But its better than staying where you are being completely uncomfortable in your own skin. This is the only body suit we get.. I cant believe I let mine stretch out and look as nasty as it does. But when you have it covered you never see whats underneath.
July 3rd was my 27th birthday and let me tell you it was not a happy one. I used to get so excited for my birthdays and I would make it a full week event. Not anymore. I used to be so happy and would run around and not worry about showing my body because I wasn't ashamed of it. Now, forget it! So I realized that some serious changes need to be made.. starting with:
How I see myself: I used smile and laugh.. I think sometime just to hear myself. Never cared what people thought about me. Always had my chin held high. Wanted better things for myself instead of settling for whats easy.
I need to stop feeling sorry for myself: What good does it really do??? It doesn't!!! It makes it worse. Stop looking out the window and wanting the past... I need to look forward to my future of health and happiness.
Gotta keep pushing: When the crossroads starts coming up on that long road again I need to just bite the bullet and keep going. I know I will feel better when I reach my goal.. it going to take a lot of hard work. Most likely a lot of sweat and tears too! But it has to be done. It's time for the chapter in my life to start and keep it going until im gone. Im worth it!!!
Get rid of the junk: I know everyone says you have to cheat sometimes. You need to treat yourself. But for me.. psh!!! that's like giving me a million dollars and taking it back! It just cant be done. The junk needs to go... it's bad for me anyway! It tastes soooo good but... it's not for me anymore.
Eat the good stuff: I love me some veggies I really do. So I am going to go nuts... Swap out the junk for all that yummy healthy stuff. All fresh or frozen of course.
::Mental note::: Make salad for dinner....
My only problem is the salad dressing... I use toooooo much.. going to cut back and get the spray stuff.. it's really good so it wont be so bad. VEGGIES AND PROTEIN BABY!!! lots of water too... It can be done.. WILL POWER!!! I GOT THIS!!!
STOP BEING SO LAZY!!!! : Seriously this is my down fall. I just need to get up off my butt and do the work... I want to start getting excited for working out. I am going to be bettering myself so why wouldn't I want to do this!!! Even when I don't want to when I feel like I cant even think about working on the fitness... I WILL.... I HAVE TO DO THIS... FOR ME AND NO ONE ELSE...
So this is the challenge I give to myself.. DONT TRY!!! JUST DO!!!! I will feel so much better when I get to my goal and I can say at the top of my lunges I did this!! I DID THIS... AND I FEEL GREAT!!!