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    68ANNE   107,268
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This day, this minute

Saturday, June 30, 2012

This day and this minute
I am not interesting,
I am not popular,
I am not the favorite child,
I am not the life of the party
How could I possible know this?
Experience teaches all of us. I know this is not a good thing to write about but this is mine and I'm gunna write about this. I don't want to be number one. I told a friend of mine that I don't have to win at cribbage I just don't want to be so far back I have no chance. This is life. I just don't want to be so far back that I have no chance. Little things get at me. Stuff that probably shouldn't bother me, does. I must have done something wrong. What did I do so that people are mad at me? I have such a hard time if I think someone is mad at me. I cannot comprehend that it is not me. I must be better, do better or make up for it so they will like me more. I do feel better just saying this, so my feelings of unworthiness will go away and I will be fine where I am. So this day and this minute are just a bit better than when I started.

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
OHMEMEME 7/5/2012 8:57AM

    Thanks for saying a few things I often think! It's these debilitating mindsets that often send me into an emotional eating frenzy. Then when I read blogs like this it reminds me that the emotions are real but the context is absurd. We can beat this...! Acknowledge, feel, move on... Keep Sparking!

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READYTOBETHIN46 7/1/2012 9:07PM

  You did a really nice job of expressing your emotions...I appreciate when people journal about things that matter to them. I am sure that you do win at some things...things that matter to others that you take for granted....we can usually find something like that within our family.

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