Wednesday, June 27, 2012
So my oldest daughter and I were talking about her birthday in Sept, and what she wanted to do. She has health problems and so she really doesn't get to be a regular teenager, she is home schooled due to her health problems. She told me she wants to go zip lining in the redwoods( we live in california) I told her ok, she loves to zip line, she goes to a camp every year for her illness and they go zip lining. At first I am thinking to myself are you kidding me I don't even like roller coasters lol. So I went on the web site to get the information and see how to sign up for her and I go. And I read the requirements the computer just slapped me in the face there is a weight limit and I don't meet it by 60 pounds. I have never in my life felt like such a failure. I have always been overweight but I was still able to do things and get be a part of my children's activities and the thought of my daughter going and having fun on her birthday while I sit and take pictures breaks my heart more than anything.
I cried for almost two hours I never thought this day would come but you know what? I am not going to let it get the best of me, because I want to be there for my daughter and enjoy life with her I only have a few more years before she will be out of the house and on her way to college. I want to cherishes every moment I have with her.
So I sat her down and I explained to her why I can't go I will go and watch her and take pictures but I will not be able to go on the zip lining itself because of my weight. This was one of the hardest things I have ever had to tell my child.
But I have made a promise to myself. I am no longer going to make my weight come in between my life. I don't want to be that mom that sits on the side lines I want to be able to do the zip lining even if I am screaming the whole way down and may even cry a little bit, who cares I am spending time with my daughter.
So I am hoping by her next birthday I will be able to go zip lining with her.