Tuesday, June 26, 2012
So I'm reading my old blogs and thought I'd follow-up. Maybe reviewing what I previously wrote will give me some insight.
Blog 4/6/2010 -- I did join a couple running clubs and volunteered to walk around and pick up trash. I finished my first marathon Oct 2011. I felt proud and was happy I did it. Then I stopped running. I got tired of volunteering with my pick-up trash organization. Currently I do no exercise.
Blog 5/18/2010 -- I stopped tracking my food and gained weight. March 2012 I started tracking again. I've finally learned to control the amount of breads I eat. Have been increasing my fruits and veges. Doing pretty well. Of course, I'm no longer running and so I'm not craving 'breads' as much anymore.
Blog 6/23/2011 -- My boss did get a promotion. I did not. Surprise. Surprise. I did not get a mortgage but stayed in my apartment. I'm on month to month and can leave easily. Stress at work has continued over the past year.
So here it is a year later. The only progress I've made is to keep tracking food, and substituting veges and fruits for breads. Everything else is the same - pretty much. That should be telling - but I'm not sure what I'm supposed to learn from this.
I've been on Spark since May 2008. Isn't it strange that I keep going between 180+ lbs to 170 lbs. I've been between that range for FOUR YEARS. I've run a marathon. I've started (then stopped) yoga. I've tracked (then stopped then started again) my food since forever.
I feel like my weight sits on my stomach like a boulder. Like my weight is separate from me. I cannot come out from under it. It's always there.
Four years being in-between the same pounds. Back and forth. 180 lbs to 170 lbs, back up, then down, up, then down, UPPPP, then down. Four years of this now.