SparkPeople advertisers help keep the site free! Learn more
    OWNSMALLCLOTHES   32,753
SparkPoints 		30,000-39,999 SparkPoints
 
 
Best friend lost husband of five months!

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Just found out of her loss. She lives several states away and I did not have a plan to meet him, but looked forward to the day.
His parents...... Are alive and buried a child. That is so painful. You never expect to bury your son, daughter..
Feel helpless, words will not assist her. Only thing I can do is email, send a real card, and call. Maybe call more often. She is so dear to me. The thought of her grief is almost too much to bear.
SHARE
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CAMAEL100 6/16/2012 2:59PM

    Puts our 'little issues' in perspective. We have so much to be grateful for!

Report Inappropriate Comment
BONNIEMARGAY 6/15/2012 3:44AM

    Life is so precious, and love is a miracle. What a blessing that they found each other while they had time. I am so deeply sorry for this tragic loss.

Report Inappropriate Comment
TANRAZZ 6/14/2012 11:01AM

    I'm so sorry for your friend's loss but glad she has a friend in you to help her through the healing process.

Report Inappropriate Comment
DJ4HEALTH 6/13/2012 10:34PM

    So sorry;(

Report Inappropriate Comment
CORINA-MOMOF4 6/13/2012 6:45PM

    :( So sorry

Report Inappropriate Comment
HEALTHY4ME 6/13/2012 5:19PM

    I am so sorry and will say a prayer for her. Please at some time say a prayer for my friend Tanna. She is having chemo for lung cancer, battled breast cancer 8 years ago adn 10 eyars ago after 3 wks of marriage her hubby was out swimming,struggled and she hauled him to shore, did cpr but he had a massive heart attack in the water. So she has gone through hel! and back and could use some prayers.

I can't imagine losing a child and hope I never have to. Close calls with my son age 10 months meningitis, 17 years crohns disease so he has to be careful

HUGS and condolences to you aas your grieve for your friends loss.


Report Inappropriate Comment
ELIZRN 6/13/2012 4:49PM

  I'm glad your friend has you for a friend. Death is difficult....one has to go through so many stages of healing. And yes...losing a child....I do know about that. I still have difficulty believing any of it. When we touch death we grow in so many different ways. We come closer to knowing what is important & what is not. We see more clearly. We understand what it means to truly feel gut-wrenching pain. It's as if we were made of glass & we are about to shatter.

Staying in touch is so important & letting the other person speak about their loss is more than important...it is the biggest gift you can give. I can't tell you how much my true friends have helped me in this way. They never tried to change the subject. I actually let several "friends" go because they just didn't want to be there for me in that way. How can I discuss dirty diapers & wedding invitations when my head is spinning out of control? In order to heal, the one who has been dealt the blow must be given space to allow the pain to exit. If you can offer that....then you have given one of the greatest gifts.

I remember writing to one of my "friends" who lives in the city where we had just moved from. She wrote back, "Elizabeth, I'm so shocked & need to think what to say to you, but I have to go shopping now. I'll be in touch." That was one year ago. Now some people might say that certain people don't know what to say and therefore go into hiding. I'm sorry, but I don't accept that from a friend. If you are my friend, then be there for me & with me. At this time it is not about you, but about me & my loss. If you can't do this for me, then I think we need to move on.

Just my truth speaking.

eliz



Report Inappropriate Comment
BLUE42DOWN 6/13/2012 3:38PM

    emoticon

Just being there, always available for her, is the best thing you can do.

Report Inappropriate Comment
GREENEYEDGIRL4 6/13/2012 3:22PM

    That is so sad. Just try and call her more often and let her know that she can call you whenever she needs to talk or cry.

Report Inappropriate Comment
HOPEFULHIPPO 6/13/2012 2:33PM

    wow. I'm so sorry. My sympathy for you and your friend.

Report Inappropriate Comment
ABB698 6/13/2012 12:23PM

    My thoughts and prayers are with them! One of my close Spark friends lost her 20 year old son to murder this past weekend, still trying to process that on my own, can't imagine how she must feel. This is our time to be the best friends we can be to our loved ones. hugs and prayers!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JADOMB 6/13/2012 11:51AM

    My prayers are with his loved ones.

Report Inappropriate Comment
SHERYLDS 6/13/2012 10:06AM

    Nothing more comforting than a good friend

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEBBIEDAY 6/13/2012 9:48AM

    emoticon Hugs & Prayers for your friend and you as well...

Report Inappropriate Comment
ROCKINMOM776 6/13/2012 9:08AM

    Prayers for that family...

Report Inappropriate Comment
CATHOLICCORGI 6/13/2012 8:39AM

    I'll remember your friend in my prayers, and will pray for you to be guided in the right direction to comfort her. Being a good listener is always a good choice. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEERLADY45 6/13/2012 8:36AM

    Im so sorry to hear that! Keep e.mailing and sending cards! Thats about all you can do and when she wants to talk, Listen! When i lost my brother the people that helped where the ones that allowed me to talk about him! Some people wouldnt talk about him ! I needed to talk about his Goodness! He continues to touch my life everyday! he was my Hero but im continuing on in my own way and im doing ok! BONNIE

Sending Blessings and Prayers emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
REBECCAMA 6/13/2012 8:14AM

    Very sad.

Report Inappropriate Comment
RAINBOWFALLS 6/13/2012 8:11AM

    Just listening can be very helpful for your friend. Yes burying a child is the worse loss of all. I have buried my oldest son and miss him very much.

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
BAKER1009 6/13/2012 8:10AM

    So sorry to hear of your loss. My prayers and thoughts are with you, and your friend.
emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
K-GETTING-FIT 6/13/2012 7:29AM

    I am so sorry to hear your friend lost her husband. A friend of mine lost her husband not long ago. You wish you could shoulder their pain. All you can do is be there for her and keep in touch. (((hugs))))

Report Inappropriate Comment
ROBBIE53 6/13/2012 7:18AM

    So sorry for her loss. Please keep tabs on her. Grieving is a long process. I just lost my dad a couple of weeks ago and I'm still in the disbelieving stage. Family and friends around helps.

Report Inappropriate Comment
MRE1956 6/13/2012 6:35AM

    Oh, dear - so sad.......sorry to hear of this loss.....

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
IAM_HIS2 6/13/2012 5:52AM

    Oh what a heart ache! She certainly needs comfort and support from you.

I will pray for her and her husband's parents. I cannot imagine their pain.

emoticon to you!

Report Inappropriate Comment
OVERWORKEDJANET 6/13/2012 5:47AM

    Sad, make plans to see her in a couple weeks or months. She'll need support then too.

Report Inappropriate Comment
TWEETYKC00 6/13/2012 5:44AM

    It is amazing how things happen. I am sorry for your friends loss. I know it doesn't seem like much, but at least she had that time with him. I can't even imagine what his parents are going through. It must be so very hard to lose a child, even if they are grown at the time, they are always your child.

Report Inappropriate Comment

Add Your Comment to the Blog Post


Log in to post a comment.
 


Other Entries by OWNSMALLCLOTHES