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Right here, right now, right choice

Saturday, June 09, 2012

Regret and fear steal a lot of energy. One of my regrets in life is that I allowed myself to become obese, that I have spent inordinate amounts of mental and emotional energy thinking about, worrying about, stressing about, being embarrassed about - being obese. At times, I fear I will never truly be free of compulsive eating, of the extra weight that burdens my joints and my heart and lungs and the rest of my precious, one and only, body. While I still carry more weight than my body needs, I have left enough excess weight behind to no longer be obese. I often feel strong, I feel a measure of confidence and comfort in my body. Most people who have made a signifcant change in their life - be it sobriety, or quitting smoking, or losing a signicant amount of weight - can cite a moment when they made a soul-felt decision to change. Any lasting change, however, tends to come down to hundreds of little choices and decisions, every single day. The quest to change, particularly to lose weight and gain fitness, can seem very complicated. This plan, or that? This book says this, this book says that. Should I listen to this "expert" or that one? Should I pay for the plan that promises quick results, or the one that says it will be easy? The more things we "try" means the more chances we have to feel like failures. I was just commenting to a fellow Sparkler that it was only when I stopped searching, stopped trying as it were, and began doing, that I was able to inch my way out of obesity. I still make choices, every day, that I regret. Just last night I overate at dinner and immediately regretted that heavy, over-full, stuffed feeling that I know too well. But, what was done was done so I drank a glass of water, went about the business of the evening, and went to bed early so I could get up, rested, for my exercise date this morning. When it all feels overwhelming and when my list of failures reads as an epic tale and my head starts to spin with all the different messages about what it takes, I need to take a deep breath, say a quick prayer, and remind myself - right here, right now, right choice. The right choice may be to post a blog to SP, it may be to drink a glass of water, it may be to stand up and put on my shoes and head out the door for a walk or a run. It could be to make my bed or do the dishes or make a phone call I have been putting off. Maybe the right choice is to relax for awhile with a good book, or take a nap, or turn my attentions to someone who needs me. I just need to put together more good choices than poor choices to keep heading in a healthy direction. So, dear Sparkler, what right choices will you make today? Life only comes at us a moment at a time, we don't need to handle the entire day at once. We don't have a rewind button so we don't need to go back in time to undo our poor choices. We just need to make the right choice right here, right now. Right? emoticon
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JENNA54 6/13/2012 7:18PM

    Another great Blog Cannie! You have a wonderful way with words. This blog really was a very timely reminder for me. I have a young nephew who has a tendency to make poor choices. The thing I am always telling him is that the choices he makes will ultimately determine his success or failure, and that he will have to live with the consequences of those choices. I need to listen to my own advice - it all comes down to the choices we make in life - that road, or another, that extra biscuit or a walk, speaking or not speaking, whatever. I can run my life or I can RuIn it.

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MNGIRLIE 6/12/2012 4:18PM

    My right choice is going to be: To not dwell on the poor eating choices I made at lunch and blow the rest of the day's eating. One poor meal choice does not negate an entire day.

As always.. thanks for the words of encouragement.

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COLUMBINE2 6/12/2012 11:52AM

    Are you living in my closet? Seems like you know exactly what I'm experiencing.

Thanks for the pep talk and encouragement!

Onward....one decision at a time. Just one decision at a time.

Have a great day ... one in which the good choices outweigh the not-so-good ones. We're striving for improvement, not perfection
N



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BAYBELIEVER 6/12/2012 8:05AM

    Brilliant! Thanks for sharing this.

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MEWHENRYSMAMA 6/12/2012 2:08AM

    Oh, so true! It is better to be doing than thinking about doing! Another excellent blog!
Thank you, and have a great week, my friend!
Love & Hugs,
Mary emoticon

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NUOVAELLE 6/11/2012 1:51AM

    How hard I've tried in my life to find this rewind button! To be able to go back and undo mistakes, wrongdoings and poor choices! But we're wisely made without one. Because, otherwise we would never learn, it's that simple! And that's how we should deal with our mistakes and our wrong choices. They are a piece of our learning process puzzle. We made the mistake, we can see or feel its poor results but we can't undo it. Now let's focus on what we learned from it.
I loved this blog and I really, really enjoy the collection of one-line quotes I've acquired from your blogs! Now, that's my new favorite: Right here, right now, right choice!
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MRSSCHENCK 6/10/2012 7:25PM

    You are so awesome. I'm printing this one out for my "Cannie Collection".

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JULIA1154 6/10/2012 6:21PM

  RIGHT!

Thanks for a great blog - this is one I'll carry in my head and come back to again and again.

Have a strong week!

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JITZUROE 6/10/2012 3:42PM

    Woooohooooo!!!!!!
AMEN!
Right here and right now I logged what I am going to be eating for lunch before I have even consumed it to keep me accountable.
And I plan to stick to it.

Bren

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MICKEYMAX 6/10/2012 9:20AM

    Right on, sister!

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CATS_MEOW_0911 6/9/2012 11:38PM

    The right choice at this moment was to enjoy reading this blog.
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LISALGB 6/9/2012 10:55PM

    A truly insightful blog. You are absolutely correct!! Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

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GOING-STRONG 6/9/2012 10:40PM

    Yes...so true. We can not go back and write a new beginning but we do have the power to write a new ending! Spark on!

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CELLISTA1 6/9/2012 10:23PM

    You are growing so much! You have always given us complex and interesting and inspiring perspectives on this whole process, but I feel like your understanding of your own self is deepening. And there is much there for the rest of us to take and ponder and learn from.

Isn't it a generally shared goal to live "in the moment"? If so, then "right here, right now, right choice" is a mantra to live by. And a simple one, if it's taken one choice at a time rather than a long convoluted series of goals, plans, and worries. I made a good choice today, to get off the sofa and take Cassie for a walk! Simple. It takes a lot of wisdom and perspective to make right choices and no one can get it right every time. I honor you for your wisdom.
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1CRAZYDOG 6/9/2012 9:54PM

  You're so right! Right here, right now, right choice. Reminds me of what a therapist once told me. Our brains process sooooo many thoughts in one minute. Our biggest job is to sift through and make a split decision . . . forget this or act on this. THAT takes practice and that's where developing good habits to replace the one's we want to change is essential. It all takes thought and planning. So you're again so right! Make that list of positive ways to respond so you're prepared when temptation hits.

Ok, it wasn't good that you did overeat, but you learned an object lesson. It doesn't feel good to do that. So, the next time that urge hits, that memory is one to recall! Again, it takes practice.

And it is all about progress, not perfection.

HUGS for such a wonderful blog, thought provoking ideas.

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TEMPEST272002 6/9/2012 9:26PM

    Great blog! It really is about making each choice in each moment.

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KALANTHA 6/9/2012 8:59PM

    Excellent!

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DUXGRL1 6/9/2012 4:47PM

    This is so true. Success is really making more mostly good choices on a regular basis. We may not always make the right choices, but if we do most of the time, we'll be successful.

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DAISY443 6/9/2012 4:29PM

    What the h*ll-"list of failures"? There are no failures, there are only decisions to not do the right thing at that moment! In your life there are no failures, wipe that word from your vocabulary. Substitute the word success when you overcome those urges to stray from your chosen path!

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STRIVER57 6/9/2012 4:08PM

    the only thing i've ever really wanted a reset button for was the house ... to put it back at the totally organized and clean and everything in it's place way it is on the day i finish preparing for houseguests or finish spring cleaning, or
the rest of the choices are the ones i made, and that made me, and they are my life, which i don't want to trade in for another one; and i don't want to give away the good parts that went with that life. but i'd like to keep making mostly right choices. they started slowly -- i joined spark a year and a half before i began using it, because i was looking for exercises, that i never did anyway. then i started participating when i came back from managing a vacation on a sprained knee and decided it would have been better with 50 fewer pounds to schlep around ... and that went quite well for awhile and then i hit a plateau ... and made fewer good choices again. came back and started bootcamp on jan 2 2011 to make exercise a habit ... and that was the most important choice. and it is a habit but i have to keep making that choice daily.

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ON2GOALS 6/9/2012 3:59PM

    Thank you Carole, thank you! Wonderfully stated encouragement for all of us.... Just keep stringing together these right choices, one moment at a time, and we will indeed arrive. (And it is no small matter that you have already left obesity behind you - that takes a lot of right choices....)
emoticon and you!

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DOODIE59 6/9/2012 3:16PM

    More right choices than wrong! That's a gentle and forgiving philosophy that will bring results in all areas. Thank you for bringing it to our attention:)

I hope you're in the middle of a wonderful weekend --
Take care
Deirdre

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WATERMELLEN 6/9/2012 2:50PM

    I made the right choice to read this great blog!!

And to click "like"!

Because: you are right. A right choice right here and right now is all we can hope for without regretting the past or fearing the future.

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SWEDE_SU 6/9/2012 2:25PM

    this blog is destined to become a "most read" entry, you have hit the nail on the head. we are all here because we made a choice - the right one right then. i remember the day i made my choice and i never would have believed the results. but i made the choice, right then, and i am here, right now - with more good choices ahead. and it is so helpful to remember that even when we make the wrong choices, all we have to do is turn around and do things right the next time.
right? emoticon

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