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    NEW-CAZ   245,774
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Tips for seniors


Thursday, June 07, 2012

Lovemaking Tips For Seniors

1. Wear your glasses to make sure your partner is actually in the bed.

2. Set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle.
3. Set the mood with lighting. (Turn them ALL OFF!)
4. Make sure you put 999 on your speed dial before you begin.
5. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember..
6. Use extra polygrip so your teeth don't end up under the bed.
7. Have Tylenol ready in case you actually complete the act..
8. Make all the noise you want....the neighbors are deaf, too.
9. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news!
10. Don't even think about trying it twice. .. . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . .. . . . ... . . . . . . . . . . .
'OLD' IS WHEN...
Your sweetie says, 'Let's go upstairs and make love,' and you answer, 'Pick one; I can't do both!'

'OLD' IS WHEN...
Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.

'OLD' IS WHEN...
Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

'OLD' IS WHEN....
You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.

'OLD' IS WHEN...
You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police .

'OLD' IS WHEN..
'Getting a little action' means you don't need to take a laxative today.

'OLD' IS WHEN.....
'Getting lucky' means you find your car in the parking lot..

'OLD' IS WHEN...
An 'all nighter' means not getting up to use the bathroom.

'OLD' IS WHEN....
You're not sure if these are facts or jokes.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post:
MKPRINCESS007 6/9/2012 11:37PM

    These are totally great!

K

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GRAMMYEAC 6/9/2012 10:50AM

    emoticon

Too bad most of the "old is..." are things that I resemble!!!

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WILSON425 6/8/2012 10:23PM

    OMG! I was at Menards this morning and when I came out I had no idea where I parked. I waited by the door for my bf and just started to follow him until he stopped and asked me where I parked! emoticon

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SHARJOPAUL 6/8/2012 10:22AM

    emoticon
I especially like the last one.

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ARTJAC 6/8/2012 2:05AM

    SO TRUE emoticon

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BRAVEONE92 6/7/2012 11:50PM

    emoticon Caz, this one is too close to home. LOL!

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POLYANNA2 6/7/2012 11:45PM

    This is hitting a little close to home...lol

Love it emoticon

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FOXFIRENDTS 6/7/2012 10:31PM

    emoticon

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DEE107 6/7/2012 10:00PM

    lol

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SHAWFAN 6/7/2012 7:04PM

    emoticon Too Funny!! This is one to share for sure!!

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OLDERDANDRT 6/7/2012 6:59PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LOVESLIFE48 6/7/2012 6:30PM

    This was great!!! emoticon Bad thing is I can relate to 1 or 2 of these statements!! Not telling you which one!! emoticon

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MEADSBAY 6/7/2012 5:08PM

    Did someone hide a camera in my house?
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LIBELULITA 6/7/2012 5:02PM

    Excellent!!! Will have to send this one to my parents!! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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HEALTHY4ME 6/7/2012 3:19PM

    LOL had to send that on to some seniors I know lol they are all younger than me! LOL

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SPARKLEIIGHGAL 6/7/2012 2:57PM

    emoticon

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IMEMINE1 6/7/2012 2:45PM

    Thanks. These were great. emoticon

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MNNICE 6/7/2012 1:49PM

    emoticon

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ANNEMAC5 6/7/2012 1:29PM

    A clever list of facts emoticon

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KATHRYNLP 6/7/2012 1:14PM

    We have to laugh at this... we have no choice.. ROTF!!! emoticon

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SENATOR9 6/7/2012 12:42PM

    Thank God men never old emoticon

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AKELAZ 6/7/2012 12:36PM

    OMG - not something I normally use - but seems apt! I try to avoid most of the things listed - but for how much longer I wonder!! Thanks so much for posting - happens that I'm unexpectedly having a bad day and you've really put a smile on my face. emoticon

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LEXIE63 6/7/2012 12:21PM

    ROFLMAO!!! I am so getting old. Thanks for the braless tip for helping to lessen my face wrinkles! LOLOLOL

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ITSHOWYOULIVE 6/7/2012 12:21PM

    Ahhh the things I have to look forward to...hopefully not until I'm 99 or so :).

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