Tuesday, June 05, 2012
Yesterday was my 32nd birthday.
All in all, I have to say that my life is pretty good. I have a family who loves me. I have good friends who love me as if I were family. And I am married to a wonderful man who loves me.
I've also got my health. Overall, I was pretty healthy before losing 21 lbs. But not carrying around excess weight and exercising regularly is definitely putting me towards a much better health path. I've also got a roof over my head and I don't have to worry about where my next meal is coming from. I don't have to worry about making ends meet. Really, I don't have much to complain about. Life certainly could be a lot worse.
And I'm also employed. I have a job. In this economy, having a job is a good thing. Oh wait, that's right my job is slowly sucking the life out of me. The internet is full of complaints and I don't need to add more negativity into the world. So let me just say that I hate the job that I am doing, I hate most of the people I work with, and I hate my boss (the boss from hell) above all else. And yes, I am actively working on finding a new job. There's a place that wants to hire me but due to certain issues cannot right now. And I want to work for them. So it's a waiting game right now. And I'm trying to hold on to those last shreds of my sanity while I wait it out.
When I'm at work, I have bad days and worse days. Last week was full of worse days. What got me through the week was the excitement of the Wall Street Run. That and the anticipation of seeing old friends at a joint birthday party I was throwing for myself and my husband (our birthdays are 12 days apart) on Saturday. The party was at a restaurant we've been fans of for years but at the location that opened recently by us. Well, the party was a debacle. The restaurant is very poorly managed and got everything wrong (including losing our reservation). And at the end of the night when I asked to speak to the manager, he wouldn't even apologize. I left with my blood boiling. I had to deal with crap all week long. I certainly did not need to deal with it on the night I was celebrating my birthday.
Despite all that, I DID have a good time seeing my friends and my friends had a good time as well.
Monday, my husband had to fly out to California for a business trip. Yeah, total suckage right there. And I knew I was going to have a pointless meeting with my boss and this other person at work. My husband keeps me sane on days like that. After dealing with my boss' crap all last week and then the debacle on Saturday, I decided that Monday, my birthday would be a good day for me to take as a "mental health day," especially since my husband wasn't going to be around. I am definitely one of those people who is guilty of not spending enough time on herself.
So I took the day off. I took the day to focus on me. I took the day so I could unwind, de-stress, and decompress. After almost 4 years of hating this job and putting up with BS day after day at work, I certainly deserve this day off. And I don't feel guilty about it. If you were to ask any of my friends or family, this day has been long overdue.
It's not like I took the day and went and got a massage or anything like that (although that would have been nice). Instead, I slept in a little and finally woke up refreshed for the first time in months. I went shopping for myself and bought things that I have needed and kept meaning to get but just "couldn't find the time." So thanks to today, I have a new purse. I am not a purse person. I just need one that meets certain specific functional needs and my old one was literally falling apart. But I had not been able to find a proper replacement until today.
After losing 21 lbs, the "girls" have shrunk. When I got re-fitted today, I found out I had lost 2 cup sizes. No wonder nothing fits. So now I finally have some new bras that fit. I was never a busty girl to begin with and it kind of sucks that I'm even smaller now but honestly, I'd rather have a smaller chest size than a larger pant size. I'd take that 21 lbs lost any day.
I got to see my best friend today for an hour during her lunch break (she works close to where I live). I got to have dinner with my parents and my brother at home (I don't live far from them either). I had 2 slices of birthday cake without guilt. It was chocolate. My dad knows me so well.
Oh and there was an outpouring of love for me here on the internet. I may not have met any of you in real life but I consider so many of you my friends. Silly but when you give me your support, it does make me feel better. So thank you.
Was there more stuff I've been meaning to do and didn't get to do today? Oh definitely. But the point was to RELAX, something I don't know how to do. And I do have to say, today was a relaxing day. I FELT GOOD today.
Today won't be easy but at least I took yesterday for me. Slowly I am learning how to spend more time on myself and learning to stress less. Because dealing with stress is also an important part of a healthy lifestyle. This is the part I have to continue to work on. And I'm every so slowly learning how.