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Bye Bye Facebook

Friday, June 01, 2012

This week I had an eureka moment. I deactivated my facebook account indefinitely. I had been thinking about doing it for a while. In the past I had tried just cutting back on the amount of time I spent on there, but that website is truly addicting. It is all too easy just to quickly check your updates, then just a few minutes later, you are sucked in.

I have many reasons for doing it, but mainly it is the amount of time that gets sucked away looking at updates from others that aren’t really important. It was inhibiting my ability to be the kind of mother that I strive to be. My children are watching everything that I do. If I continued to play on the computer all the time, I could only expect them to want to do the same when they get a little older. Monkey see, monkey do. Above all, family first. My children are immeasurably more important than my facebook friends.

As a facebook user, I find myself updating the world with many tidbits of my children’s lives. Be it pictures, or status updates about what they’ve been up to, I do it because they are my world and they are the most important thing I have going on in my life. But by doing that I am also taking away from their privacy, of which they have no say over. It is one thing to do that to myself, but I should be protecting them with more privacy.

Also, when I step back and take a different look at social media as a whole, I realize that yes, it helps me stay up to date and in touch with many friends and family, but since I am being “social” all day long it is probably preventing me from making my “real” relationships more deep and meaningful. I have honestly found myself sitting face to face with a friend, but instead of enjoying my time with them, I’ll be daydreaming about a different conversation on facebook. Not good.

I have about 400+ friends on facebook. A much smaller fraction are “real” friends, people who without facebook I would still see, speak to, and keep in touch with. I will miss staying in touch with those who I wouldn’t otherwise, but the ones that are important I will stay in contact with and they will stay in contact with me.

My husband is one of the few people in the world that never joined facebook. Whenever he would see me on there, he would joke about updating my status to something like, “Wow, it is warm outside,” “I had pizza for dinner,” or even “I just took a big poop and I feel great!” Although he was just being funny, he it totally right. Most of what showed up in my feed is really not important, I’ve only been gone a few days, but I can’t imagine I’ve missed much. I read an article which said this need to broadcast yourself is a form of digital narcissism. So true.

Anyways, I only deactivated my page a few days ago, but it was truly liberating. I feel free. Although I still hear myself thinking of witty status updates in my head, I have found more time in my day, and more time when you have a toddler and a baby are priceless. I didn’t totally delete my account, I can still go back to it if I want, so I guess I’m not 100% facebook free, but I don’t plan on going back anytime soon. The “addiction” still lingers, but one day I’ll be strong enough to click delete.

For now, I plan to do more, instead of telling the world what I am doing.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FIRECOM 6/9/2012 2:55PM

    I still have an account although I really dont know why. I do look to see what my grandkids are doing and I like that. Sometimes TOO MUCH if you know what I mean.

Quite frankly, I am blown away by some of the contents.Too much information.

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ADAM2298 6/6/2012 9:30AM

    I had joined Facebook but but the one thing that annoyed me was that these friends wanted me to play those games. The games were not anything I was interested in doing. Then I also noticed that I spent a lot of time on what ?
I too deactivated my account but a couple of months ago thought I would reactive it. I did and then 20 seconds later, I deactivated it for good.

Plus the last company I worked for seemed to be looking at their employees pages because they would announce company polices that were being violated by comments of their Facebook pages. I thought, I want my stuff private and not have my employer looking to see if there were compliance issues.
That was enough to make me just junk the FaceBook habit.

Comment edited on: 6/6/2012 9:33:38 AM

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SNOWSNAKE 6/1/2012 12:23PM

    I also never bought in to the whole Facebook mentality, I have never done it, and never plan to. I love the outdoors too much to spend anymore time on the pc. I also had a stalker a number of years ago, a 5 year nightmare of scary threats to me and my family..... I have no plans of making it easy for my family or myself to be accessable again to someone like that! Kudos to you for realizing the kids are watching, learning social skills, and to give your real friends an actual phone call or visit in "real time"! Good for you!! ***SNOW***

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BLUE_KARMA 6/1/2012 10:38AM

    I'm with your husband. Never joined. Part of my issue was that I didn't want to join for the reason a lot of my friends were - to check up on their kids.

I like calling and writing friends and family. Lucky for me the all respond!
My kids live away now, but they are great about emailing and texting pics and messages all the time.

I'm glad you're enjoying your new-found freedom!

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PJBONARRIGO 6/1/2012 10:30AM

    Good for you! Great plan and goal; let's all do more! emoticon

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