Thursday, May 31, 2012
Recently, I have been trying to come to terms with the difference between wants and needs or in other words appetite vs. hunger. Appetite is your desire for or interest in food. Hunger is your need for food. I tend to eat because of my appetites instead of my needs. Like many people, I am an emotional eater. If I am having an emotion, I eat. Anger, boredom, frustration, guilt, happiness, or relief. Food is my coping mechanism, my reward system, my comfort zone.
My head understands that using food as an emotional satisfier is detrimental to my long-term goals. Yep, I've read it, heard it, know it. But putting that knowledge into action has been a lifelong (up to this point!) battle. I think my wake up call was this weekend. We went to an Ice Cream festival. My lovely and totally awesome daughter took pictures of me, her beloved mom, participating in some of the field games. I scrolled through the pics ont he way home.
I cried all the way through my shower that night. But the next morning I woke up resolved. I will get serious about my health. God gave me one body. I am blessed with good general health and I don't want to waste this blessing.
I am now officially obese, according to my BMI. The 10 pounds I had wanted to lose is now nearly 50 pounds. I'm putting myself and my family at risk for heart disease, diabetes and cancer by continuing down the road I am on. But all that is about to change!! This is going to be an exciting journey back to me; the me that was not embarrassed by my looks, could run around with my kids and not feel fat and slow (OK I was always slow, but we can't all be Speedy Gonzales!) and felt beautiful for my husband.
Thank you Sparkpeople! You are changing lives, including mine!!
More to come as I walk, run, trip, fall and get back up on my journey to me.