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LMULLINS4LIFE
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Don't Worry, Mom...I'm ALIVE!

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Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Well, I've been sitting here rubbing my eyes and trying to figure this blog out for a little while now. Usually, I create my entire blog in my head during my morning run. But, today I was focused on the run and nothing else.

I had heard there was a 5k/10k coming up here in my town on Saturday, but had dismissed it because, you know, MY first 5k isn't until July 28th. However, I received an e-mail yesterday from a personal trainer friend from church (she actually led the "Made To Crave" study that I was in that started me on this whole healthy lifestyle) and she is giving a presentation on health after the race and wanted to know if I'd come watch. Suddenly, the idea that I'd so quickly tossed aside a week ago began to turn itself over in my head.

I thought, "Of course I'll go see Julie speak and support her." If I'm going to be there, I might as well go a bit earlier and see all the race day festivities. And, if I'm going to do that, I might as well run the race, seeing as it's the same length that I've been running with no trouble in my training runs for the past couple weeks. And, you know, I probably won't run the entire race. I'll probably walk some of it, but I know for a fact I can finish in under an hour...which isn't bad for a chick who broke 5 bones just two years ago. This could be a really big victory for me. And it would be some good experience for future races. And, I mean...it's right in my backyard. I don't have to drive anywhere or get up super early. Ohhhhhh.....ok...."REGISTER". Done.

I've done my due diligence and research and tapered my run this morning down to just 2 miles (man, that felt short!) And tomorrow will be a complete rest day...healthy eating, to bed as early as possible. Friday, a short 20 minute run with some speed bursts. As good of sleep as I can get on Friday, then it's Race Day. Through all of this, I will be hydrating like a monster because the high on Saturday will be 94 degrees, sunny and 0% chance of rain. I don't expect it to be too bad when the race starts at 9:30am and, luckily, it's just a short 3.1. Nevertheless, I am already hydrating.

I texted my family last night (mom, stepdad, sisters) to tell them what I had so flippantly decided to do. My mom was quite worried, but we ended up having a great chat after that and I guess I can share some of that...perhaps it will give you some insight into what this sport means to me now. Perhaps it will resonate wtih you...or remind you of another activity in your own life that brings you just as much joy. Plus, I love to be nosy and read other people's texts. Haha.

MOM:
Are you conditioned for the run? Remember to hydrate well before, during and after the run. Please take it easy and at a realistic pace! The goal is to "finish the race", not be the first to finish. To meet your goal, you will need to run a mile in 15 minutes.

ME:
Mom. I am conditioned. I've been running for a month under a certified personal trainer's guidance. I am laser focused on my injuries and listening to my body cues now. I run a 5k as my normal practice short run. It's not that hard. I am training for a half marathon next May. I normally run 5k in 43 minutes and usually don't push too hard. But if I don't get 40, who cares? I will have finished a 5k in under an hour just 2 years after a devastating accident. That will be sweet victory.

MOM:
Well, I guess I need say no more. I did not know you were training. I am so proud of you and, judging from what you have shared with me, your goal is attainable.

ME:
You're a cute mommy to worry. :) My body has completely transformed in the past 4 weeks. I can feel it. And see it. I feel like a brand new person. Confident, beautiful and completely EMPOWERED. It's amazing! I've never been more happy in my entire life. I am literally GLOWING.

MOM:
No more antidepressants. :) Sometimes depression is chemical, hormonal and/or environmental with life stressors. Sometimes all it takes is a little help getting to the normal level and then one can learn to cope and manage the depression without meds. You don't have to live with the generational baggage anymore.

ME:
Yeah. Running has released a lot of emotions. It has almost changed me emotionally and spiritually more than it has physically. I didn't expect that. I never want to get up and do it, but the second I get outside and that 6am burst of dawn hits my lungs...it's instant energy. I work a lot of things out in my head while I'm running.

MOM:
I'm so proud of you.

ME:
I cannot believe I'm a runner and pretty much on my way to becoming an athlete in a sport. It's crazy! I never thought this would be possible at my weight and with my past injuries...but these excuses were just smokescreens and not real. They were lies, based on FEAR.

{Aaaand...scene.}

Whatever it is that fulfills you the way running does me, I hope you find it. And I hope you do it for the rest of your life. There's just nothing more thrilling than feeling truly alive...and I wish for that for every one of you.

If there's any way I can help you, you guys know how to find me.

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