Tuesday, May 22, 2012
It could be my advancing years are mellowing me. But an exchange I had with my son today would have sent me into orbit a few short years ago.
I, a claustrophobe, was under the sink trying to get a nut off so I could change a broken faucet. Mike came in and asked if there was anything he could help me with.
"Sure, Mom wants the toilet seat in the little bathroom replaced."
"I don't know if I can do that."
"Two little nylon screws in the back. Not rocket science."
"This better not take too long, I have to get Jackson from school in an hours." He babysits.
(If it takes and hour ...)
He took the seat with him. "How do I take the old one off?"
(With your f.u.c.k.i.n.g phaser.) "Just undo the two nylon screws in the back."
Next: "I opened the box. There aren't any instructions."
(Jesus Christ on a pogo stick!) "It's just two nylon screws on the back."
"Oh. But why no instructions?"
(Because not everyone is a dumb as a pile of pebbles.) "I suppose they figured just two nylon screws in the back was self explanatory."
"Oh look! Dad, this is funny. They have instruction on the outside of the box. It was really pretty easy. I didn't need any instructions. It was just two nylons screws in the back."
(Somebody ought to give you two nylon scr ... never mind.)
I suppose they had to cover even the option that a pile of pebbles WOULD be replacing a toilet seat.