Sunday, May 20, 2012
Not much in the weight loss department this past week. Which I don't understand. But I have learned that I don't need to understand it. I just need to keep doing what I am suppose to, eventually the scale will catch up.
I do want to understand more though, so I keep researching and learning, and trying to pay attention to what I do and what results it produces. So I do still keep trying to fine tune and figure out what works the best for me. The nice thing about tracking, I can go back and try to do similar things to produce similar results. Who knows though, if it is a cummulative chain reaction that finally kicks in, so I know I am doing the right things but trying to learn if some things are more right than others for me individually.
I am going to miss my first official goal that I had set. Which was X lbs by Memorial Day. I am not stressing that either, though a little bit bummed I guess. BUT - I am almost 50lbs lighter than last Memorial Day and I didnt start to get serious until January. I maybe lost 6 pounds in 2011.
No, that was not my first goal. My first goal I did meet, which was 10% of body mass by April 9, for the Transformation Nation. And I did do that one. I think I was like 11%
So anyways, I am not making my Memorial Day goal but I am waaaaaay farther ahead than LAST Memorial Day.
I also came up short in my spring challenges. That is disappointing also, and I really thought I would not have any trouble with those. That is the disappointing part I think. I wasnt cocky with my attitude or anything, but I really thought they would be a cake walk. Easy Peasy.
When I got serious about my journey, I really thought the weight would come off faster when I started doing the things that I was suppose to. But I guess my fat has a different agenda and time schedule. I think my body wants it gone as much as I do, but my fat has a mind of it's own.
But, I still had a great week. Lots of physical activities done. I planted my shrubs. I planted 3 rows of windbreak trees, and then replanted every single one again. After I thought about it, and went by MO planting suggestions which was different than the one I was following I decided to move them all around. I think this will make for a more attractive display when you are viewing from the house. My grandson, 6, helped me yesterday with planting some willows by the pond, we picked up a few rocks, rebagged the cans (truck load of 25 bags ready for the recycle center) We planted some yuccas, cosmos, and a number of other flowers in a good size flower bed. Planted a few more things and tended the garden - it is looking Fantastic! Keeping up with the mowing is a chore even with the rider, but I use my pushmower several times a week. So I was very physical outside. I mean sweating buckets.
Also this week, something happened that hasnt happened for a long time. Remember my new shirt? I wore it to the store the other morning, and the cashier, who I have known since I was a teenager, said what a cute shirt! And then she proceeded to ask if I have lost weight. And said I looked great, yada yada. So that's one thing, I can't remember the last time someone told me my shirt (clothes) looked cute. I always just bought big and baggy, whatever I could find and I tended to wear the same ole things. So that was a big boost for me. And then I mentioned that I still want to lose more and she said how much more? And I wanted to say 100 more, but 75 came out instead. And she said oh you dont need to lose that much!! And for the first time, I uttered to another human being how much I weigh. I said I am still over 200lbs, 217 to be exact. And she was like well you sure dont look it!! So that made me feel good.
And I know that I can carry my weight pretty well, so that is why I have mentioned before that I don't know how much I want to end up at, because being athletic I look better with muscle, and I need muscle to do what I need to do around here, and so I know I will look thinner but yet weigh more with more muscle mass. So if that is the case, another 50, 60, 70 might be a good place for me. At least 70 I think. I know I am a fairly strong person so I know I have muscle hiding under the fat, so that is probably why I "carry it" okay.
So anyways, she was so encouraging but didnt want me to over do it. She said well you already look great and with each pound, you will just look better and better, even if it is only one more pound - or something like that. I can't remember exactly but at the time, I understood what she was trying to say.
And then one day this week, I think it was, my daughter noticed my hard work. I think that was this week. She sees me often, most every day, so that was nice. I know we don't see the day to day changes sometimes, and then one day it is like wow, when did THAT happen?
The other first time in a long time thing was: I got my hair done!! So when I went to the store, I had a new shirt, a new do, and a new highlight!! It has been 6 or so years since I went to a beauty shop last, for one of my daughter's wedding. I do really like how it turned out. So at Orscheln's yesterday, a friend works there part time, and she tracked me down so she could see it. She works at the City Hall building during the week with my SIL, so she knew I had it done. SIL's DIL (my nephew's new wife) is a new beautician and she is the one that did my hair. I would have gone to her sooner, a few months ago, but I didnt realize she was working in town yet.
So anyways, those were some nice firsts or firsts in long time.
I was updating my budget the other day (I use You Need a Budget) and I have some "red" in my clothes column haha. Imagine that. I never budget clothes for myself. So it looks like I need to start that. Yet another First haha But I went to my grandson's preschool graduation the other night, and the attire was Sunday dress. All I had was my new shirt that went well with my white capris. But thought I should dress up a little bit more, so I found a really cute white skirt and a turquoise shirt, and I got a new white belt!! The style is such that it is completely filled with holes, so it can grow down with me :)
I was rushed for time, so I did revert back to my old ways somewhat in that I didnt try anything on. And I wasnt sure of the fit, and didnt want it too tight, etc so I did still buy slightly too big. But w/o a belt, I can wear the shirt as a night shirt also and it is soft and comfy. And the skirt, I think my sister can take it up some when I need it. I can get by with it for now but since I dont wear a skirt very often, it might not fit the next time. It is a casual skirt and I am not one to wear a skirt to town, but I might this one. I can pull off that look I think. Then I can get more wear from it.
I also got a new pair of sandals. Casual also, so I can wear those with shorts. And they are white. Bad color for me and shoes. But I am going to try to take care of them. Usually every pair of shoes that I have, especially new ones, I always end up in the barn lot with them. I get home and have to go check on a horse, or something. So I am going to try not to do that, and start my shoe collection. I tend to wear the same old ones, some ole style. So I want to start to build my mass collection haha.
When we built, I gave my husband the larger closet. I had the big huge dresser, so I didnt think I needed the bigger closet. I didnt have much to put in there. I can see maybe having to switch with him in the near future haha Well really though, aside from shoes, I dont want to buy too much until I lose more weight. So I dont need shoes either. I will get shoes to match a new outfit when I get to that point. I am hoping next time I need clothes for a new size, it wont be for a special event and I will have time to go to the Good Will Store - take my time and look around.
So back to this weight loss thing. I really thought it would be easier than it has been. I lost a fair amount of weight after child number 3. I am guessing 50lbs and that was probably 17 years ago, before child #4. It seemed to just fall off. One day I was heavy, one day I was super fit again. So I guess I had these dellusions that it would be easier than it has been. I think also part of why I am diluted, is because the times I would think I wanted to lose some weight, I could lose 6 pounds just like that. But then revert back to old ways. So the next time the urge would hit me, 6 pounds just like that again. So I have learned now, it was all water weight. Then when the scale would stop, I would get discouraged and stop trying. I was probably always on the verge of another big drop but I would give up too soon.
So this time, almost 50 pounds gone now. The first 30, was pretty fast. The last 20, not so much. Lots of ups and downs. So my eyes are wide open now. I know I can do this but it will just take steady persistance on my part. And since I am not "dieting" I know I am in it for the long haul. This is my life now. And I am becoming a better & happier person every day.