Saturday, May 19, 2012
I was a mess last night when I wrote my blog. My head was swirling with way too many things and I didn't know where to start, so instead of starting at the beginning, I started to obsess over the end.
I reached out for help though. I reached out to Spark, and I found the support that I needed. I moved forward today, from the beginning, and got a few of the small pieces out of the way. I feel better now that I have my feet firmly planted again and I don't feel like I'm spinning out of control.
While my food and exercise didn't happen today, I was able to take care of some wedding stuff and also talk with my parents about helping me to finance law school. Without their help there is no chance that I can even do it, so that was where I needed to start. They now have more than 3 months to think about it before I have to register to take the LSAT. In the meantime, I can prepare for the exam and will know before I put out any money at all if they are willing to help me by co-signing on loans. Either way, no loss at this point, and I go to Plan B (which is an MSW).
Tomorrow is a new day for food, and a new week for exercise. I actually have pre-cut fruit that I HAVE to eat tomorrow or it will spoil. And I think I'll rinse the grapes and leave them on the table for me and the little one to snack on. I had NO water today, and I can really feel the difference. Back on track in the morning.
This website does more than keep me accountable. It lets me vent and freak out and lose all composure. There is always someone (usually a few someones) to help me calm down and pick up the pieces. My life is crazy, and adding the weight loss to it can be overwhelming sometimes. But, I also know that I feel centered after a work out and I lose the stress of the day. Plus, learning healthy eating now, while my daughter is still so young, is going to give her a much better chance to pick those habits up and maintain them through her life. And really, everything that I do is because I just want the best for her.