Your mind is the most powerful computer on the planet. We only use a fraction of its capacity. This seat of emotions is the throne room where decisions are influenced and made for good or bad. Humanity, for all of its learned study, has yet to comprehend its capabilities. What we allow to reverberate within its walls will ultimately determine whether we succeed or fail.
Regulating your self talk is not just some feel good non sense devised just to fill some space in a book. Brainwashing and mental torture techniques rely on repetitious reciting until we either go crazy, or succumb to the will of the "programmer". Your mind is like an off road forest trail that trucks take. The more times a vehicle passes over that area, the deeper the ruts become until the path is so rutted that even though you try to avoid it, your vehicle gets sucked into the ruts and you are stuck. By allowing the negative self talk to remain, our mental thought processes automatically fall into the rut of self defeat. We are unconsciously programming ourselves for failure. Our thoughts guide our decisions, decisions create actions and actions create destiny. We are what we repeatedly do. While training for my first marathon, I learned that my mind typically gives out long before my body is truly ready to give up. In short, I found that I am much stronger that I thought I was...and so are you.
Be careful of your self talk. As insignificant as it may seem, how you talk to yourself sets the tone of your internal environment. In this environment lies the seat of emotions and produces great influences upon our decision making thus the birth of the self fulfilling prophecy. Even as harmless as ''i was bad" ie... I ate a donut at work today, can be a drain on your enthusiasm. Since when did we place moral value on a pastry as if consuming one will brand us with the "Scarlet Letter"? The journey is difficult enough as it is without being your own saboteur. Setting such high standards for yourself, I will never eat those... is setting yourself up. Rather, try saying to yourself "I avoid donuts because it is not in my best interests to eat one at this time". To say that you will NEVER eat one is unrealistic at best.
You are better off to never make such a declaration, than to make one and never live up to it. Your heart will hold you accountable. Each time a self declared proclamation is violated, something in your faith gets chipped away until you don't take yourself seriously anymore. Soundness of resolve dies, is buried, and yet another attempt to live a healthy life rots away, then is quickly forgotten to dull the pain.
Failed expectations exact a high emotional price.
I try to make it a point to encourage myself with all of the accomplishments, both big and small, and tell myself that I have what it takes. It may seem kinda silly but it helps create an environment inside where, instead of dwelling on my failures, I feed on my successes. "Robert, you got out there and ran after work today, dude, you we so tired but you did it" , "nice job walking away from that pile of munchies", or "it wasn't the workout you envisioned, but you still fulfilled your commitment, nice job man". When I first started this journey, my self talk was literally peppered with words like dummy, stupid, idiot and so on. My soul was so filled with hatred for what I had become that I couldn't speak peaceably to myself. There were those in my life that used those words toward me on a routine basis and I think it got embedded.
It is so important to love yourself right where you are at. You are not stupid, a dummy, or an idiot. You are a unique individual with special gifts and talents that only you can give. You are important right now, not will be once you lose 50 pounds. It is such a shame that our society is so appearance crazed that a persons worth is judged by how closely they conform to some airbrushed super model.
Loving yourself where you are at is one of the first steps to creating an environment of emotional stability that will allow you to progress in your weight loss journey and it will nourish you during the tough times when you need strength for the day.
Next In Series- Emotional balance part 4 - Realistic weight loss goals
Introduction To Series:
So far we have reviewed the following paths to emotional stability,
1) Journey To The Root Of The Problem
2) Developing A Logical Relationship With The Scale