Is there really such a thing as the "perfect weight"? I received an email today from Everyday Health - their newsletter Living With Diabetes. It had an article titled "Calculate Your Helathy Weight." So I followed the link and entered my height and weight and it told me I was more than slightly overweight and that my BMI was an alarming 37. That just added to the already depressed mood I'm in today. The site btw told me that my ideal weight is 114 to 144. Wow. If I went down to 114 I would look anorexic.

Last night we - the whole family - went to the local Parks & Rec office to get our photo ids for the pool for the summer (I cannot wait to swim again). OMG I look disgusting. I took one look at the photo and actually asked "do I really look like that?" My girls of course - ever the loving children with more soul than most adults - told me I was beautiful and they loved me. Almost rehearesed. My husband ... looked away and avoided the question. Hello? Really? I just wanted to slice my wrists right there (don't go getting all weird on me it is an expression I do not believe in or condone suicide ... although there are days I certainly understand ho someone could easily fall from grace and go there).

So it got me thinking - how do i safely get down to that 114 (or close to it)? Other thoughts were that I need to do something with my hair and get some new bras. I have a sports bra on in the picture and there isn't the same support so I don't look ... perky. Instead I look ... blobb-ish. Who knows - maybe eeing myself in a picture is what I need. Hopefully posting it here will embarrass me enough into doing smething.

One problem is the lack of energy but that is for another blog entry entirely ...