Monday, May 14, 2012
It's been a little over 9 months today since I started trying to get myself back together. Since August 1st of last year I have went from 252 to today *drum rolls* 220.8! I had set a goal of like 175 by August of this year but realistically I have been thikning that by setting that large of a goal it makes me think that well if I gain a lb this week I have another week to loose it. It realistically sets me up for failture, so as of today I am shooting for mini goals. Next mini goal is 210 by my birthday when I will be *sigh* 29, July 16th. That gives me about 9 weeks to loose about 10.2 lbs. Which I know with how I yoyo eat and exercise is going to be a feat in itself. This is the first time that I can ever remember loosing weight and being able to keep it off 32 lbs or it.
I have always been a "big girl" my dh said that he liked "bigger" girls so my weight was fantastic to him (back then I was 175 and that was in 2001 *sigh* again). After some severe illnesses, loss of job, depression, taking care of my terminally ill father, and a million other things I lost myself and my weight. I am now having to pay for the torture and stress that I had put on my body for years and I am falling apart at the ripe of old age of 28.
This year I have...not sure how to say this without souding b*tchy but I have asked some people to leave my life. They were creating drama and making me feel less of a person. Cleansing my mind from them has been hard, and not working once again makes me feel ick. But I am trying to clean and do things around the house, do yoga when my back hurts or not, go walking a few times a week even if it's just around the block with my 3 dogs (really I have to burn more than 50 calories around the block being pulled by 3 doxies right and then carrying the 3rd when she gets tired.)
So I am feeling accomplished, I totally cheated today and ate a slice of pizza at sams and had a soda which I never do, with my pcos and stuff I try to stay away from all that crap when I inputted my stuff into the tracker I was pleasently suprised to see that I had more than enough calories and etc left for a nice meal (btwn 180-600 score!).
I plan on blogging more, I find it helps me relax and getting things on paper helps me think them over and understand them.
So today I am 32 lbs lighter and going on 29 years old in a few months :)