I Quit

Voted Popular Blog Post: View All Popular Posts

Monday, May 14, 2012

I quit judging my self-worth on my weight or the size of my waist.

I quit reading magazine and internet articles like "How to Blast Your Blubber and Get a Flat Tummy in 4 Weeks" or "The Amazing New South Amazonian Fish Fin That Can Make You Lose 20 pounds in 2 Weeks!"

I quit tormenting myself by going into stores I -know- don't have my size and fantasizing about "oh, the day I can fit into this..."

I quit obsessing over calories, carbs, fats and sugars and weighing my food.

I quit making myself feel guilty for actually enjoying something I'm eating.

I quit stressing myself about my dad or sister coming to visit and what they'll think of my weight gain; I wouldn't love or think of them any less if they gained weight, and if they do of me that's their problem. And furthermore,

I quit apologizing for my weight. I am the way I am and if you don't like it then go somewhere else, no one is making you look at me. And on that same topic,

I quit allowing myself to be any less beautiful that I am. Just because I'm bigger doesn't mean I don't have beauty. Maybe some people can't handle so much "beautiful-ness" in one place, but they'll just have to live with it.

I quit waiting for some man, who may never come along, to make me feel beautiful, too. It's time to learn to feel beautiful because I AM beautiful. That's all the reason I need.

I quit acting like I'm worth less than I am, too.

I quit hiding my face when strangers talk to me, and responding with a voice only slightly louder than a church mouse. I'm an opera singer for pete's sake!

I quit hiding at home every night because "someone I know might see me"! Let them! Let them see me smiling and happy. Let them see that my size has nothing to do with my happiness.

I quit refusing to accept myself as I am right now!

I quit punishing myself for my size by refusing to buy new clothes because "I'm not going to be this size for that much longer anyway".

I also quit keeping clothes in my closet that I can't fit anymore in order to "motivate"myself. More like taunt myself... If it doesn't fit, it goes. Time to make room for fabulous, well-fitting clothes that help me showcase who I really am, instead of hiding under breath-constricting, dulled, frayed clothing that tell nothing about me.

I quit letting what other people think of me dictate what I think of myself. And,

I quit listening to what other people call me (fat, ugly, lazy) instead of what God calls me (daughter, beloved, beautiful).

I quit putting myself down. I wouldn't say the negative, degrading things I say to myself to anyone else, and I'm not going to do it to myself anymore.

I quit treating God's temple like a cheap, pay by the hour motel.

I quit letting my weight issues ruin, diminish or reduce even one more minute of my life. It's going to be a struggle, but as long as I don't just roll over and let it run amok, then it doesn't have the chance to. And most of all, and I do mean, most of all,

I quit being ashamed. This is a trial for me. An issue that I have to work out and through to be better, and stronger. I know I can't do it by myself, but with God's help and the support of those He has placed into my life I know I can be victorious. I may have to quit every hour, every day until I get the hang of it, but I'm just a person with my own problems to work through and there is absolutely no reason to be ashamed of that.
So, I quit!
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post

More Blogs by THE_COUNTESS