Sunday, May 13, 2012
I'm afraid of where this journey will take me. I want to get healthy. I want to be slimmer. I want to get back to working. BUT it scares me. I look ahead and think Oh my what a long road that is, and look at all those obsticles too. And I wonder if I'm really up to this challenge.
Well there's one way to find out. I really have to give it my best effort. I think I have been.
I've gone from dispising exercise to now I like it. I look forward to exercising. I'm finding that the exercise is something I can control in my life. Much the same way I used to think of food. I used to eat because it was the one thing I could control and it brought me pleasure to eat. Now exercise does that for me instead of food. Oh I still enjoy my food, but who knew that I'd one day be impatient to get home so I can exercise. Who knew that one day I'd be upset by the weather being bad because that meant I couldn't go out and exercise. Who knew that one day when I was bored I'd choose to get up and exercise instead of eating.
With my growing enjoyment of exercising though comes one thing into my mind over and over.
I want to run!!!!
I want to be able to get out there and take a morning run and enjoy it. I want to strap my shoes on and hit the road. I want to be able to just go take a run when I need to clear my head.
I've always envied those who ran. Even back in high school, I would watch those others who ran and wish I could do that. I read the blogs here about people who run and think, I wish I could do that.
I know you all are saying, "you can do that if you want". You're probably correct too.
I'm afraid! Afraid I'll screw up and hurt myself or something.
I do know that the more blogs I read about fellow sparker's running it inspires me and makes me think more and more I might give it a try. I'm just not sure I'm ready for that yet....as my elliptical work outs have my quads hurting like crazy right now hahaha. But I do believe I'll keep a hold of that dream of running some day.