*letting out a gigantic exhale*
Ahhhhh, that felt good!
I was talking to my mom on the phone yesterday when the subject of me coming home was broached. My apartment lease is up in mid-September, and I have to give 60 days notice when I plan on leaving, which would be mid-July. Two months away, which will come quickly, I have no doubts.
I have been completely torn about what to do. On one hand, with the economy the way it is, it would be completely absurd and irresponsible to quit my job and move. (Which is exactly what I did to come out here and I was unemployed for 9 months) If I decide to gain employment in Cali before I move, odds are I would have to go month-to-month on my lease, so my rent would go way up, which I wouldn't be able to afford with my current rate of pay.
I really would prefer to have a job (obviously) because I don't want to be a burden on my parents. They are already struggling as it is. That has been the huge conflict I'm having. Everyone wants me home, but I hate the thought of being a financial burden to them (though I would more than make up for it with my charming personality and baseball knowledge, haha). So I finally said those words to my mom.
"I want to come home but I don't want to burden you."
To which she replied, "Well, let me tell you something..." She told me their plans (which I won't disclose because of the personal nature of the information). Basically, she told me that my homecoming is more than fine and she's not worried about me finding a job, saying it would be much easier if I'm in town for the interviews (which is totally accurate). And she knows how antsy and restless I get without having a job, so I would be applying nonstop. A girl can only watch so many baby daddy episodes of Maury Povich you know? Plus I mentioned I would go back into retail, just to have something until I could get full-time with the state again or in the private sector.
Once their plans come to fruition, probably in the next month or so, I have asked her to get back to me, to make sure that she and Dad were sure it was still okay. Then Mom said, "So, when you give your sixty days tomorrow..." Funny lady, I WISH it could happen that quickly!! But yeah, they want me back and I can't wait to be there.
When I give my 60 days, the crunch is on. I'll have to sell my furniture (because I'll be staying with the parents for awhile I'm sure), minimize my possessions, figure out how many people I need to fly out to AZ to help load a Uhaul and drive it 12 hours home for me, rent said UHaul, eventually give my notice at work. I'll have to save my pennies for all that, yet still keep extra dough for my bills that I'll still have every month (credit card, car insurance, etc). It'll be a hectic headache, but one I gladly looking forward to experiencing. I've done it before; I can do it again.
If I get a job, I'll be home sooner. If not, I'll be home by September 20th (the last day of my lease). And I couldn't be happier to go home, sleep in my old twin size bed in my tiny room with no walk-in closet and one bathroom for 4 people.
Right now, that sounds like Heaven.
I'd like to introduce you to my family, my world:
Me and my mama in April 2011:
Me and my papa on Christmas Eve, 2011:
Me and my protectors (AKA my brothers) in June 2011: