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    STEPH-KNEE   77,127
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My Body Is Begging Me 2 Stop The Madness!


Sunday, May 06, 2012

So the last couple days have not been the best... because of my weird sleep schedule, it feels like it's been 3 days, but it was technically just yesterday that I posted my binge blog. While I stopped in the middle of it, and have not binged again, I just have not been making good or smart choices. Eating junk, and not even bothering to track. Today I found myself resorting to an old habit. It is amazing how quickly we can fall back into an old pattern.

My habit for MONTHS was to get up, get ready for work, and pick up Burger King on the way. I start work at 5pm, and I used to be at a point point where I was so hungry by 4pm and this was an easy fix for me. I would eat chicken tenders and french fries on the way to work. It's a scary thought, especially considering the amount of calories, and that was just the first meal of the day. Even if I ate relatively healthy the rest of the day, it didn't matter, since the first meal pretty much contained a days worth of calories.

Today I found myself in that drive thru for the first time in weeks. I was even joking with one of my friends that the guy at Burger King probably thought "that fat girl probably died of a heart attack or something"... because just about every Saturday he would see me ordering the same thing, and then it stopped for at least a month. I would even go some Sundays as well, depending on things. He even stopped asking me if I wanted dipping sauce, he just threw the ranch in the bag. Talk about embarrassing. Add on to that the fact that I live in LA, not some tiny town somewhere. He had plenty of customers each and everyday, but the same fat girl, ordering the same combo every weekend stands out I guess lol.

I will not go into details, I don't want to give TMI, but my stomach is pretty pissed. Between the grease fest of yesterday and now this today, my body is screaming, please, just stop. I practically lived off fast food, and that paired with laziness is the reason I am overweight, plain and simple. So my body was absolutely used to high amounts of fats and grease, and I typically didn't have a problem. It's amazing to see that even though I don't feel I have been making that many changes or doing that great, my body does recognize it and it can recognize when I'm starting to slip. Good reminder to keep moving forward, one day at a time, one meal at a time.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KRYSTL719 5/15/2012 8:42PM

    We can all relate. I know I can, heck, I didnt get to 330lbs by being healthy right? =) Keep your tracker updated even if you gained any weight, and lets continue where we left off! The sooner you come to terms with it, the better, and thank god you blogged it and told everyone, most people just stopped coming all together back to sparkpeople.

We want you here just as much as we want to be here. Everyone makes this an amazing sparkpage, so lets fight those food demons. The cravings will pass. Lets go back to square 1, when we choose water instead of giving in, or chew gum... it helps me.

Take care sparkfriend! it will be just fine. emoticon

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BABBINA 5/15/2012 8:30PM

    Wow girl, u sound just like me! Yea t is embarrassing where the take out order taker knows u by face & what u like and expects u like clockwork. Then the oddest things is when u cut down on junk food for a while & come back to it for a treat, all of a sudden yr body can't handle it anymore!!! For years I used to eat like 1-2 steak quesadilla @ a shot several times a week along w other text mex items like it was nothing! Let's just say last mth, I had my 1st one one in mths & caught a nasty case of food poisoning... its crazy man.

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THESHELBSTER 5/11/2012 10:46AM

    You are human. Don't beat yourself up for it. Today is a new day!

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DEBADEAU 5/6/2012 2:14PM

    My body reacts the same way when I eat bad food now. So you had a couple not so awesome days, just start over again with your next meal!

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