Sunday, May 06, 2012
So the last couple days have not been the best... because of my weird sleep schedule, it feels like it's been 3 days, but it was technically just yesterday that I posted my binge blog. While I stopped in the middle of it, and have not binged again, I just have not been making good or smart choices. Eating junk, and not even bothering to track. Today I found myself resorting to an old habit. It is amazing how quickly we can fall back into an old pattern.
My habit for MONTHS was to get up, get ready for work, and pick up Burger King on the way. I start work at 5pm, and I used to be at a point point where I was so hungry by 4pm and this was an easy fix for me. I would eat chicken tenders and french fries on the way to work. It's a scary thought, especially considering the amount of calories, and that was just the first meal of the day. Even if I ate relatively healthy the rest of the day, it didn't matter, since the first meal pretty much contained a days worth of calories.
Today I found myself in that drive thru for the first time in weeks. I was even joking with one of my friends that the guy at Burger King probably thought "that fat girl probably died of a heart attack or something"... because just about every Saturday he would see me ordering the same thing, and then it stopped for at least a month. I would even go some Sundays as well, depending on things. He even stopped asking me if I wanted dipping sauce, he just threw the ranch in the bag. Talk about embarrassing. Add on to that the fact that I live in LA, not some tiny town somewhere. He had plenty of customers each and everyday, but the same fat girl, ordering the same combo every weekend stands out I guess lol.
I will not go into details, I don't want to give TMI, but my stomach is pretty pissed. Between the grease fest of yesterday and now this today, my body is screaming, please, just stop. I practically lived off fast food, and that paired with laziness is the reason I am overweight, plain and simple. So my body was absolutely used to high amounts of fats and grease, and I typically didn't have a problem. It's amazing to see that even though I don't feel I have been making that many changes or doing that great, my body does recognize it and it can recognize when I'm starting to slip. Good reminder to keep moving forward, one day at a time, one meal at a time.