Friday, May 04, 2012
FINALLY!! I've NEVER had this much success with losing weight all at one time before! 10 months without a REAL plateau!! I started out at 322 being my top regained weight, but am now 220.51. I MUST keep reminding myself of that. I am too prone to forget how far I've come. I am at the point where it is difficult to want to continue, because I desire to eat as I used to eat, but I KNOW how much that DOES hurt me! I can't do that anymore! I do not eat potatoes, rice or pasta at all anymore at this point. It's got to stay fully OUT of the diet, or I WILL NOT lose weight.
I still feel like I felt when I weighed this much 20 years ago... still unsatisfied with where I am. I'm getting SO MUCH CLOSER to being back into a size 18!!
I have got to focus on just eating right, drinking the water, and getting out to walk or doing exercise videos, and not focus on where I am, or I might get too nervous.
This is new territory for me, and it DOES make me nervous. I don't know how to be a thinner adult. I'd rather be invisible. I don't want the "ugh, you're too fat" reaction I'm so used to, though! I just need to do the work, and then start to deal with the head and emotional factors that get triggered after, I guess.