My husband and I both work full time jobs. He's an attorney and I'm involved in social work/therapy. Both of us do stressful work and have enough to do to fill 24 hours every day. Regardless, we also have two little boys, an older daughter, two dogs, six chickens and a household to run. It is often hard to fit in a workout.
Since beginning my new life style, I have committed to doing a significant amount of cardio twice each week- preferring to do two 60 minute Zumba classes where I can see friends, enjoy the music and dance. I think of this as social time, a dance lesson or even party time- but never exercise.
Exercise has always been a dirty word to me. It meant hurting, sweating and doing something painful for way longer than ever "necessary". It was never enjoyable, always forced and often painful. Exercise was something to be avoided at all costs.
After doing Zumba twice a week for the past three months, this week I ran into a sticky situation. Due to work schedules and home-life responsibilities, I was not able to go to Zumba as planned during the week. As I talked with my husband about our schedules and plans, I came to the realization that I would miss a Zumba session. I was sad, though it took me a minute to figure out why.
The people, I will see them again in a few days. The music, I can listen to it on my Ipod- but the feeling my body gets *from dancing for an hour straight* was something that would be missed.
And so, to fill the void that Zumba left today, I found myself on the elliptical machine in our bedroom. Headphones on, I jammed out to the same Reggaeton that I would have been grooving to at the studio. I told myself I "had" to do 10 minutes- but as I started, I found myself listening to more music and thus doing more exercise- three times as much as I had intended.
It was strange. Without going to Zumba, I missed exercising. I experienced a feeling that I HAD to do something. I NEEDED to feel my heart beat faster and for sweat run down my neck. I think I actually WANTED to exercise, or at least wanted the feeling- the adrenaline that exercise offers.
It was the weirdest feeling ever, and something never expected. I indulged in the desire to exercise. It felt OK as I was doing it and INCREDIBLE afterwards.
My body is becoming accustomed to this, my mind and spirit too. Exercise is becoming something I not only need, but WANT to do. I never expected to WANT to exercise.
It's a weird feeling.