Wednesday, April 25, 2012
I feel horrible today. I don't know how this just hit me like it did, but it feels crappy. Both of my knees hurt, my hips are stiff, and my back just feels funky. I haven't lost any god damn weight, and it almost seems impossible to loose any. I have plans on how to, Ive made tons of plans. I just need to follow through with them. I quit smoking and it wasnt too hard, I just recently broke myself off caffiene and that wasnt too bad either, a lot like quiting smoking but I did it. SO why cant I just give up certain foods and loose this damn weight. My mother likes to bring in the spiritual thing about my fat being my protection, because of all the crap from my childhood. Well I'm pretty much over my childhood crap so why do I still hang on? I can quit food. Not all of it just the stuff that keeps me fat, fast food cheeseburgers, chocolate crap, fatty cmfort food, and everything else that all around sucks for me.
I need to go on the 1800 calorie a day diet. That leaves me with 600 calories per meal. Lots of fruit and fresh veggies in the middle. get rid of the meats, only once a week from here on out. Lots of soup and raw fruits and veggies, juice and water, with a little decaf tea here and there. I think I've thought of a good way to exercise without hurting my knees so bad. I figure the elliptical a little and the bike a lot. I should go to the gym at least four days a week. and keep up with it all on here. I just have to do it. I just wish I didn't feel so crappy and heavy today. Now to go pick the kid up from school, he feels icky now, damn allergy season.