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Were they talking / laughing at me?


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Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Most likely not, but a good reminder that I do have that little insecure voice in my head somewhere. Thankfully she's never been strong enough to overwhelm me.

This came about tonight while working out at the gym. A group of three or four guys were walking from one area to another and stopped almost immediately behind me, started speaking in a language I don't know and laughed.

My very first thought was "What? Is my butt jiggling or something?" (And, yes, on occasion I wonder what I look like from behind in the gym, or what I look like through other's eyes.)

My second thought was "Why on earth would they care enough about that to stop, talk and laugh? Yeesh, I can't believe I'd even think or concern myself with that."

What I really liked, though, was the third thought. "It doesn't matter either way because I am doing exactly what I need to be doing to make it better!"

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Member Comments About This Blog Post:
ALIDOSHA 10/28/2012 7:26PM

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SKINNYMISSKASEY 4/30/2012 7:53PM

    I have had several moments like this at my gym with me (and once they actually spoke my name out loud!). It's very odd.. I just hope it's in a good way, lol!

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FRAZZY2 4/30/2012 4:42PM

  I agree with babbina and all the others to keep being true to yourself!!!!!The music is in you baby girl keep up the good work!!!!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 4/30/2012 4:45:56 PM

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FRAZZY2 4/30/2012 4:40PM

  I agree with pixiewixie's comment and it was right of you to keep going,as we say down south,THAT'S WHAT'S UP!!!!!! STAY STRONG!!!!!! emoticon

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BABBINA 4/30/2012 2:54AM

    Ugh! I love what you said at the end! Perfectly said & so so true, that least yr doing something abt whatever it is, for you & not for them.

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RDY4THIN 4/30/2012 1:46AM

    The only comment I ever heard from a guy was describing my legs as having "thunder thighs". Until that point I never considered myself as fat/overweight, but bottom heavy (pear shaped). But it stuck and while I was attracted to the more fit guys they never seemed to give me a glance. Compared to the underfit, skinny, I guess I look fat. Now compared to fit bodies, I probablystill look pudgy. But I am BETTER THAN I WAS! Hats off to you... .and go forward with your goals!! As JCDROL said, YOU will be hot but they will still be shallow jerks. emoticon

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COREY195 4/29/2012 11:18PM

    you are doing great. emoticon

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MADELINEFINCH 4/29/2012 7:00PM

    That's wonderful! "It doesn't matter either way because I am doing exactly what I need to be doing to make it better." Such an inspiring thought. It's hard not to get overly self-concious about my body, especially when I'm exercising. But those who care don't matter, and those who matter don't care :).

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MISSLISA1973 4/29/2012 11:04AM

    You hit that nail right on the head! Good for you! emoticon

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CAROLJ35 4/29/2012 10:48AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MANILUS 4/29/2012 9:50AM

    You came with the right line of thinking, you are doing the improvement on yourself.

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JCDROLSHAGEN 4/29/2012 9:21AM

    Who cares what jerks think?! When we are hot, they still will be jerks (and shallow.)!!
Have a great day!

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EVANIAN 4/29/2012 9:06AM

    I have had many kids tell me that I am fat. This really hurts, but it is worse
when adults dont know how to behave well.
Keep up your hard work!

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AZCHICA2006 4/29/2012 8:36AM

    I know the feeling, I often see guys (in the weights room) look at me, look away, look back again and say something to one of their friends. I always have my headphone in so I can't ever hear them though. I wonder what they are saying, if they are making comments about the fat I still need to lose while they have none, of if they are wondering why a "girl" is the in the weights room. I figure, too, that it doesn't matter because I am there and I am doing my thing to make me the best me I can be.

Just keep doing your thing!

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PLAYLIN 4/28/2012 7:28PM

  Wow how many times have I felt that little laugh or whispers behind their hands and just know I'm the topic of conversation. Real or not , the thought is still there. It makes it hard for someone to even go out in public after that. I really compliment you on your attitude and courage. I hope that I'll be able to let this roll off my back the you the next time.

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SNFOSTER1 4/28/2012 5:16PM

    emoticon

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MISHL2012 4/28/2012 2:23PM

  Whats the best part for me is that you didn't stop and worry about #1. you let your brain keep going until #3 and then happiness. Thanks

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SERASARA 4/28/2012 1:10PM

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SWEET40SOMN 4/28/2012 12:39PM

    Perhaps it is my age, don`t know for sure, however, last week my mother and I went to lunch at a nice restaurant , we sat at a booth, shortly after we we arrived, there were three business men seated at the table, next to us. These guys kept looking at us and smiling, real big, mom and I smiled back. This smiling back and forth went on through out our entire lunch. As I got up to assist my mom with ambulation, all of these guys mouths drops open, and one of them almost fell out of his seat, literally. My initial thought was to tell them off and remind them that they were over weight themselves and had no right to be appalled by what they saw. Then I thought, that would only feed into their ugliness, and so I said " you gentlemen have a great day" and I gave the one who nearly fell out of his seat a great big wink and said I`ll see you later." Mom and I had to hold our breaths until we got outside to burst out laughing. I told mom as we were getting in the car, see even though I`ve put on all this weight.............I still get plenty of attention.................. Mean people suck................... emoticon

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GIGIDISAPPEARED 4/28/2012 12:33PM

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CALAMITYJANE53 4/28/2012 9:39AM

    Spot on! Well done! emoticon

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KDMAMA2 4/28/2012 8:52AM

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SHIROIHANA 4/28/2012 8:23AM

    Amen to your last thought! If they did stop and laugh at you, it will be you who will have the last laugh as you are on your way to a better and healthier you.

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THISTIMEMYWAY 4/28/2012 7:07AM

    Thanks! I needed to be reminded this morning since I will be going back to the gym after a while and am feeling a liitle insecure about what others who I saw before will think about me still looking the same, I.e. No progress.
BUT WHO CARES! Life is up and down. NOBODY's PERFECT. emoticon

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WHQPHQ 4/28/2012 3:09AM

    Wow you have a really positive attitude, I think I need to steal some!

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TNELLY37 4/28/2012 2:26AM

  I've been there before. I have insecurities because of my weight. I was teased by the popular kids when I was in high school, the mean girls, the snotty cheerleaders, and the ignorant jocks who had nothing better to do, than make fun of other people. But I have to let it go, not let other people stop me from reaching my goals.

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LYNNIERN 4/28/2012 12:30AM

    Awesome read, loved the third part!! emoticon

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LOVEREDDESERT 4/28/2012 12:09AM

    Awesome that you keep that insecure voice inside your head in check. Perhaps you can keep reminding her about the incredible things you have been doing to improve your life. Remind her that you are the one in charge and how much you rock for being at the gym in the first place.
Oh and those guys...who cares anyway. You are taking care of you!!!

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TYLERDRANGUET 4/27/2012 11:37PM

    What a great attitude! In all honesty, though, they probably thought you were cute!

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CM_GARDNER78 4/27/2012 11:04PM

    Wow - great job!!! :-) That's a huge NSV if ya ask me!! I have the HARDEST TIME not thinking everyone is talking about me. Like anyone wants to talk about me! Geesh! ;-)

Way to go!

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KANOE10 4/27/2012 4:50PM

    Great.. Believe in yourself and ignore them! Good job. emoticon

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NOLAZYBUTT110 4/27/2012 1:19PM

    They were probably gay~ guys who wanted to make a comparison with your butt! lol Let it go, dont let what other thinks, say or do affect the way you are, because its not worth getting upset about. Or feel insecure, or as if someone is stalking you or laughing at you! Just smile and think, " yep, I got a good a$$!" lol Its what goes thru most other peoples minds when they are looking and laughing at others... esp in a gym or ona side walk, : thinking about their own and your rear end. lol Its a game of Comparisons~ sweety! They laugh becasue they dont have what you have! Its what its all about! And if you are beautiful they are jealous and its why they are laughing; they are insecure about theirs and its why they laugh! I know the psycholigy of their sneers! But they are really laughing at their own selves! lol LMAO because I know exactly what they are thinking.... "what I am thinking? Is anyone noticing....mine? ! lol Big Time!

Comment edited on: 4/27/2012 1:57:52 PM

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MELLYBEANS0919 4/27/2012 1:08PM

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SSEARE 4/27/2012 12:36PM

  I've felt this same insecurity so many times...unfortunately, it's not confined to the gym. Your quote at the end of the blog, "It doesn't matter either way because I am doing exactly what I need to be doing to make it better!" is the perfect phrase to say to myself when I wonder if I'm a spectacle of some sort. Thanks for the lift. These little SparkPeople nuggets contribute to my daily successes.


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AZURELITE 4/27/2012 11:55AM

    Third time's the charm... or in this case 'third thought's the charm' !
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ELUNAMAKATA 4/27/2012 11:30AM

    *high five* +50dkp ;-)



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KNEWMETODAY 4/27/2012 9:56AM

    Sometimes I think I'm such a nice person, yet I tend to think the actions of others are suspect. I need to cut both of us a bit of slack.

You did a good thing!

Kathy

Pixiewix
ie--awesome take!

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BLUEJEAN99 4/27/2012 1:17AM

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ROXIT22222 4/27/2012 12:46AM

    Yay! I like the third thought! It was the one I was going to say before I read it!

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TUBJUMPER 4/26/2012 11:13PM

    Exactly right!

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DANIELJASON 4/26/2012 11:06PM

  I get that feeling too..I'd give a little chuckle myself :D good for you ! that's awesome and keep your head up !!!

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AMMAVI 4/26/2012 11:01PM

  Good for you for winning out on this one!!! Keep up the good attitude and hard work!!

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SALSA_DIVA_44 4/26/2012 10:56PM

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JERZGURL_NAN 4/26/2012 9:44PM

    THAT's RIGHT!! Congratulations for reasoning through an uncomfortable situation. It's insane what our insecurities create sometimes, isn't it?

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LUCINDARW 4/26/2012 9:02PM

    great attitude! Keep it up. emoticon

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KENNY83 4/26/2012 8:31PM

    "Be yourself to the fullest no matter what others may think or say", I remember reading that somewhere. I like pixiewixie's comment lol, had me laughing. Good blog, reminds us all of that inner insecure voice in all of us. emoticon

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PIXIEWIXIE 4/26/2012 8:17PM

    I think what they were actually saying was:
Guy #1: Check her out, she's HOT!
Guy #2: Look at that perfect butt.
Guy #3: Hey, I think I'm gonna go and ask her what she's doing later.
Guys #1&2...etc.: Laugh, laugh, laugh... Are you for real? She's WAYYYY out of your league!
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MISSY455 4/26/2012 7:37PM

    Good for you! Love the attitude!
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JOANNEENTWISTLE 4/26/2012 6:46PM

    I actually skipped a job interview today because I saw myself in the storefront and thought, "Nobody is going to hire a fatty like me!" It was at the courthouse! The money! How foolish of me! Never again. I'm going to be out there living life no matter how much I weigh, because that is the only way to get healthy and lose weight, by letting go of the shame.

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BERKCHIK 4/26/2012 6:01PM

    Love that 3rd thought! I wish I could think, who cares it's only a laugh, maybe they need one. But I wouldn't think that...then again, maybe I would!

Great share. Thank you!!! emoticon

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