Saturday, April 21, 2012
Dear Spark Friends,
I'm here to share because I know there are so many of you that care. It helps that I can blog about what's going on in my life, 1st because I empty my mind by typing it out and 2nd because I know my Spark Friends are reading and caring.
There is a girl several years younger than me that I befriended when she was really young. Her name is Shannon. She lived right below our church and so, when I was married, my husband and I would pick her up to drive her up the hill or take her down and drop her off sometimes depending on the weather. She called me a lot growing up. There are times we have lost contact, but we've been talking a lot for the past year or more. She is somewhat mentally disabled. She can function pretty well, but she is really slow in her thinking process. She got married several years ago and had two kids and then when he divorced her, she went crazy. She left her kids with her mom and ran off. She got into a lot of trouble and her mom and dad adopted the kids. Then she came back to live with her mom and dad and help take care of her kids. About 2 to 3 months ago my heart sank when she told me that she was moving to town to get away from things. Well long story short, she moved in with some troublesome youth and started getting into trouble. She got caught shoplifting three times and on the third, it's considered a felony and that means real jail time. They took her yesterday. She is only about 28. She seems much younger mentally though. She seems so young. My heart is breaking. I keep replaying in my mind, if I would have just spent more time with her, or if I would have just said a little something more or something else. She's had such a hard life. I know that she made the choice to do those things and crime equals punishment. I've been told that I was a good friend to her. I've been told a lot of things, but it is still so hard. It hurts so much. My heart literally aches. She is all I think about. I can't let it depress me, but I'm having a hard time shaking it. I looked it up and the prison time for that crime is 1 to 10 years. I was thinking she might be in for a few months for shoplifting, but I didn't realize that it was her third time either and I don't know what she was shoplifting. My heart just hurts so bad. I've cried a lot of tears and I've prayed a lot of prayers. Oh Lord be with that young girl. Thankfully her kids are doing good. They are too young to understand too much and she's been gone from them before. Actually they do better when she isn't around because she can't mentally handle taking care of them and so she makes their lives very topsy turvy with her erratic behavior. Even if they're better off without her in the house, even if she is better not being in the house she was living in, my heart still breaks. I wish I could have taken her under my wing and let her move in here, but I just couldn't do that with my boys. Lord be with her.