Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Ok so today has been one of those days. where i found myself emotionally eating.
Im a competitive person and I think ive found a new way to keep myself motivated - my nana is in FL right now, but she is coming home in May.... so if i start now , i want to loose 10 lbs by the time she comes home. I want her to see that i made PROGRESS since she left. So my goal is to loose 2 lbs a week. I think thats do(able) for a month. So i hope this keeps me "focused" :)
I need to find new ways of dealing with my "depression" when it strikes. Not run to food when i feel the need to "hide".
Idk how i can have an AWESOME day then go backwards all over again. Its frustrating to me, and i find myself embarassed with myself. So i wanna see the 150's by the time my nana comes home. That simple.
I also dont wanna use the scale as my go to, to see my accomplishments. Last night i put on a pair of Pj pants that are a size XL but by no means should be an XL - should be a Lg but anyways- these pants that were TIGHT on me, were now BIG on me. Which felt awesome. I like seeing clothes fit :) especially ones i couldnt fit into before.
I used to use the crap my husband used towards me, as FUEL. Like haha u watch and see.
Im gonna have to dig deep and really get angry. Not sad. And push myself like ive never pushed before....