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    LUEYGIRL   11,041
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Am I just making excuses?

Monday, April 16, 2012

I've always been the type of person, even when I've had self-confidence issues, who has believed that if you put your mind to it, you will get what you want. (Hate to say it, but part of my "sergeant-attitude" Mom in me!)

So, I struggle with why I can't make my weight loss and shift in attitude to this lifestyle change. (I have maintained a 4-lb loss through the month).

I've had a lot going on again, but don't we all, always?

Here's what the past month or so has been like for me:

* After more than 2 years, lowering prices, countless showings (which means heavy-duty cleaning and organizing each time) and a humorous offer , we may finally have a decent offer on our house. So, my husband and I have been getting serious about looking and deciding where we want to live. His job as a medivac pilot offers many opportunities across the nation, but now things are different with our daughter. We've run the full gamet from staying in our house and fixing it up to moving 1,000 of miles away.
However, I'm happy to say we've found a house nearby that we like and may pursue.

* I had another mammo and ultrasound last week (just a check-up). Thankfully, all was well, but it puts your heart through a wringer each time when you've already had one surgery for breast disease.

* My hubby's been working some OT lately - which means we're like 2 ships passing in the night and that all parenting falls on my shoulders (God love you, single moms!)

* My four-year-old has been growing emotionally and physically. That means lots of testing and lots of attitude coming from her strong-willed personality. But yesterday, we may have turned the tides for a while - it was like having a different kid all of a sudden! She was sweet, listening well, and helping out around the house. I'm keeping my fingers crossed!

* She and I have both had bronchitis. I've been coughing for a full 5 weeks, even with a round of antibiotics! Finally, it seems to be clearing up. My hubby got a mild cold in the midst of it all, (although he once again, was "so sick"), so the household has been a bit upturned.

* My daughter turns 5 in May, so there is also the "Midnight Fairy Party" to plan. Don't get me wrong, I don't go overboard. It will probably be about 6 or 7 girls for a craft, activity, and cake, but there's still planning to do!

* My mom's situation is heating up again. To make a long story short, I've been pushing to get her into assisted living for over a year. She 's 84 and has some early signs of dementia, especially when anxious and stressed - to the point of delusions and hallucinations. One sibling has been dragging all the rest of us down because of her own denial. My mom lives a 3-hour drive from me. Now I get a call one Friday night from my older sib where she says, "We need to get mom into assisted living." Really? You think so? While I'm glad that we're getting on the same page, because I have power of attorney, my two sisters now want me to jump on it and get things all set up. How about a little help here?

* In addition to my full-time job, I'm volunteering for 3 community projects right now. I'm writing press releases for a communtiy art show, working with my church to publicize the church's anniversary, and designing the theme and running art therapy groups for an art show for Sexual Abuse Awareness Month (April). The last project started as them "needing my help" and turned into me becoming a major player to get things done.

* I continue to deal with fatigue, probably due to a lack of sleep, but also due to the hypothyroidism and fighting signs of a low-grade depression (as I have for years). It's like walking through molasses some days, but I keep on keeping on. Of course, lack of exercise and sleep don't help the situation!

So, am I right to feel a bit stressed and tired?
Am I Ok that I don't focus on me and weight loss?
Should I just say no more often! (And I have to other things, believe me!)

How do you make sure you get time in for yourself?

We're all busy and have crazy, stressful things happen in our lives, yet many of you are still making it happen.

What am I missing in my mindset to make myself a priority now?

Do I just need to be meaner and more selfish?

Am I thinking about this the wrong way?
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FITGIRL15 4/24/2012 10:44AM

    Why can't your husband do more? (The OT is that necessary? Or can he opt not to take it?) It sounds like you need to reach out to him now more then ever. Have you ever sat down with him and discussed your weight loss goals, and how you need "me time" to acheive them? I've been thinking lately that our society (ME included) work too hard for the almighty $$$ at the expense of actually living a happy, fulfilling life!!!

Being a little selfish isn't a bad thing, it keeps Mommy's happy. "Happy wife, happy life"... you know that one, no doubt!

I was just telling another Spark Friend that when I made the Spark shift (to tracking and eating better) I had to take time away from the amount I exercised to focus on food more. Once it became a habit, I no longer had to track, and I could focus on just living again! You really have to try different things, and discover what works for you!!! There is NO one-size fits all plan here, unfortunately!

You can do it!!!! Be patient!

Comment edited on: 4/24/2012 10:47:01 AM

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FANGFACEKITTY 4/18/2012 1:23PM

    You definitely have a lot going on and the stress and fatigue is probably a normal result. But with everything you are doing, how much of it is for you? It doesn't sound like you have much - if any - "me time", which is a problem. You have to take care if yourself too. It is not selfish at all to spend some of your time focusing only on your needs and health. Maybe say no more often to the extra Community work and use that time to refocus and reprioritize. You can always add it back in later as other projects are completed. Good luck!

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JANDK156 4/16/2012 12:18PM

    It sounds to me like you have an awful lot on your plate just now! Maybe you need to move yourself to the top of the list though? If you exercise, it will help alleviate stress. Then, maybe if you are feeling less stressed, things won't feel as overwhelming? You have to be at your best in order to care for everyone else, right? emoticon

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