Sunday, April 15, 2012
Ok, so I've had a not so great week. Somethings were in my control and some were not....but most things were and this is where my confession comes in. I totally messed up this week, didn't go the gym one day, tried to convince myself I was making healthy food choices when I knew I wasn't, and I totally over ate. All right, so that makes me feel a little better to be open about it. I know the mistakes I made and this time around, I'm not going to deny them or try and hide them. I will own up to my mistakes, learn from them and move forward.
The Gym. Well, this was kinda my fault, kinda not. I did not feel good all week and it started on Monday. I was honestly having these pains in my chest, like sharp stabbing pains that took my breath away. The pain would then radiate into my arm. Soo...I was totally scared at first, but I soon marked it as stress. Over all, though, I just didn't feel right. I woke Tuesday with the same pains so I decided not to go to the gym not knowing was going on and I didn't want to be on the treadmill and pass out or something. Thursday was my next gym day, however, I had to leave work early because of the pain and broke down and went to my doctor. Good news, nothing too serious! I have acid reflux and a few years ago had surgery to 'correct' it and it looks like something is no longer working. All the pain I was feeling they think is from the acid reflux as well as stress. I rested the rest of the day Thursday....no gym. Saturday morning was my next chance, didn't happen. We cleaned in the morning, which was a good thing, but that's about as far as I got. My husbands birthday is Tuesday and we went to 'birthday weekend' lunch at a place he's never been. We really enjoyed ourselves and I fell into the trap of, 'I didn't eat breakfast so I can really enjoy lunch'. Bad idea. Today was supposed to be a gym day, but we went out last to a concert and got home late and choose sleep over the gym.
I convinced myself I was making healthy food choices all week.....I know deep in my heart, I wasn't. I tried, I always began the day with good choices, but by the end of the night, I found myself looking at what I ate and was disappointed in myself. I have some days like this, but I've never really experienced a whole weeks worth! All though, to my defense.....the chicken sandwich I ordered for lunch.....I didn't realize it was breaded until they brought it to me, it didn't tell me on the menu! BUT NO EXCUSES!!
I over ate......and need to come to terms with it. This really ties into myself trying to convince myself I was making healthy food choices when I wasn't. Last night, after the concert, my husband and I met up with friends for a 'post concert' drink. We ended up ordering nachos and took them home, in which I preceded to eat the ENTIRE box by myself!!! Oh, I'm so embarrassed! I can't believe I did that, yes they were so very good, but I seriously did not need to do that! Today, I really haven't overeaten much today, however, I didn't really make the best food choices. I 'snacked' throughout the day, which I didn't want to do. I snacked on foods that weren't the best choices, all though I could've made worse.
What did I learn from this? I learned that I have got to stop convincing myself I'm making a healthy choice when I'm not. I did it so much this past week, I can do nothing but own up to it. I learned that even though I make bad choices, it is ok and I just have to pull myself together and move forward. I learned, it is NEVER a good idea to have some drinks at a place that serves tasty nachos!!
My goals for the week ahead?
Enjoy and celebrate my husbands birthday on Tuesday while still making good choices. We are going to a little Jamaican restaurant for his birthday dinner. While I know the foods there aren't the healthiest, I will do my best to make really good choices throughout the day Tuesday so that I wont feel so guilty about it.
Gym Time! I will go to the gym this week and make it worth my time. Now that I know the pain I'm feeling is nothing dangerous, I can work out and not worry. I actually look forward to my date at the gym.
Try and blog more. I find the days I'm posting a blog, I get to really reflect on the day or the past few days. It really helps bring things into perspective.
Read a good book. I finished a book Friday night and am ready to start on my next week. I even got into the first chapter Friday night, but I'd like to try and put aside a little time each night before I go to bed to read a little.
Another wonderful weekend has past, I look forward to the week ahead and making better choices!