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Feeling more Fat today...


Friday, April 13, 2012

I know I am still fat, but I don't really feel fat most days. I don't know if anyone else knows what I mean or feels that way. When I was thin, I felt fat. Now that I am fat, well yes at my highest I felt fat, but now 42 pounds lighter, I dont feel so fat. In fact, I was feeling pretty good, sexy almost even. Does anyone else feel that way or know what I mean?

Well anyways, so I was feeling so much better about everything, but this week.... I have been a bit under the weather due to sinuses, and therefore not exercising. My weight has held steady, maybe even losing half to one pound still, but I just feel different. I just feel fat.

I noticed it yesterday. I just feel fat again. I feel like I did before the 42 pounds was gone. I did have some yogurt yesterday, which I have most days, but now I am thinking I really need to pay attention to how I feel after every food, and see how it is affecting me. Maybe yogurt makes me bloat and feel fat? So I guess I really need to start paying attention.

I had some oatmeal earlier in the week, just to prove to myself that I could without issues, but then I was ummm ... gasey.... and felt miserable for awhile, most of the day actually. But I was also eating some cooked cabbage, so that might not be fair to the oatmeal. But I do still think I should stay away from the oatmeal. I just hate that though. I was starting to like it, it is cheap, but it does not fill me up for very long so I guess in the long run, it really isnt that cheap if it just takes more food a few hours later.

I also have not really exercised to speak of. So maybe the key for me to feeling better is to make sure I move every day. I mean I know I should anyways, but maybe this has just proven it for me on a personal level. I have still moved and got some things done, like rearranging and reorganizing, just not over exerted to break a sweat.

Ok, so I was feeling bloated I guess is the word. I felt like my stomach was my old 42 pound ago stomach. So last night, I measured just my waist and it was the same, so I felt better. I didnt measure anything else, I just went to bed.

And I slept. For almost 12 hours. So I do feel better today I guess. It is rainy dark and gloomy, but my garden needed it, as did the pastures for the horses, so I am thankful for that. I need to just plug in a DVD and hit it I guess, or hop on the elliptical.

I know my sister feels achy on rainy days, with her arthritis. But I just feel like a little ole lady puttering around the last few days. I need to snap out of it. Writing this down has helped. Thank you to whoever might have listened to my babble :)
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Member Comments About This Blog Post:
MRSWHITEWOLF 4/16/2012 1:14AM

    Hang in there! I have felt that way many a times

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BLUE42DOWN 4/13/2012 5:52PM

    What you mention about feeling bloated - definitely. There are days when I just feel puffy and bloated, and yes, those add up to feeling "fat", especially in clothes that are normally just right.

My DDa had trouble similar to what you describe with eating oatmeal. A quick search seems to indicate it may have to do with the fiber level and should subside after a while - or that it can be improved by not just switching full to it, but rather adding it in slowly. (And being gassy is yet another puffy feeling.)

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EXOTEC 4/13/2012 1:47PM

    It sounds to me like you have a couple of attributable reasons for "feeling fat". First is the bloating and post-sickie stuff. I find that foods will affect me much more intensely now than they used to when I just ate and didn't pay any attention, too. Eating for appetite, in other words.

I used to catch lots of attitude from family and friends about being a "picky" eater -- but I think that was never true! My body was just trying to tell me what it couldn't process. That includes nearly everything in the cabbage family. Just try to eat Paleo/Primal etc without all those dark-leafys! sheesh Since I've been banned from grains, I find that even oatmeal has an effect now. Never used to ... but since its virtually the ONLY grain I eat now, my metabolism has locked on that and will grumble some when it gets any. As a result, I don't give it much, or often!

And yes, I know exactly what you mean about your body image! All my clothes used to be the "big sacks" variety ... loose enough to conceal the worst of my "curves". When I started to be able to drift at least a bit toward "real" clothes, I did feel almost "sexy" ... only in my own perception -- I'm nothing like that to anyone else (yet)! It was a unique experience to actually be able to sense clothing against me that I knew wasn't collecting in the folds or highlighting all my worst features! Now, at a "lighter" weight, when things don't fit in that new way, I DO feel fatter than I was when I actually WAS fatter. It's a weirdness.

Keep listening to your body. It's one of the few things that will still tell you truth. We clearly can't trust the nutritional experts of the last half-decade!

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LAURELSPARK 4/13/2012 1:33PM

    I'm sure that the sun will come out for you soon!

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GRANNYSUE9 4/13/2012 1:12PM

    I often feel that way too. But some of the foods we eat can make us feel bloated and gassy. They are usually the foods that are good for us. Hang in and just keep going. Take it one day at a time!

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VALKYRIA- 4/13/2012 12:32PM

    i have been dealing with food intolerances (gluten and liquid milk) lately... I've found something really helpful is just keeping a food journal: don'T just log calories, but also how you feel about 30 minutes after eating each thing you eat every day. This is the surest way to figure out what is bugging you.

As for the oatmeal.. I find steel cut oats fill me up better than rolled oats, but I have to buy the specifically "gluten-free" ones, because most oats are NOT gluten free (they are processed on the same machinery as wheat, and so they trigger my gluten intolerance by bloating me up and making me feel crappy).

But yeah, I know how you feel. Before I self-diagnosed my intolerances, I would bloat up and feel SO FAT, and yet not really gain any weight on the scale. I hope you are able to figure out what is affecting you.

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SHANSHE 4/13/2012 11:40AM

    Yes I know what you mean about feeling fat sometimes and not feeling fat other times! I have felt and not felt that way before, myself!

Hang in there and you will get back to feeling non-fat, lol!
Shan

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EOWYN2424 4/13/2012 10:55AM

    Hang in there!

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