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Dear SparkPeople: I failed miserably!!! :(

Monday, April 09, 2012

Dear Spark People: How many times am i allowed to start over??

This was supposed to be Week 2 of the 'Official Tame your sweet tooth challenge' for me...well actually i was supposed to be in week 4 by now...but...i hate to say it: I failed miserably!! emoticon

And the guilt is laying heavily on me!

...i am starting to think....that this challenge may not be for me...because all week i was thinking the following:


Seriously i have to get a grip on this...i am not sure what is going on all of a sudden....i was able to control my cravings so well....but when i have it right in front of know in my face:

I can't resist!!! emoticon

I am weak! emoticon

I tell myself:"Oh only one little tiny piece"!!

Of course it never is 'just one little tiny piece"!!! emoticon

I am weak!! emoticon

I have zero..null...zilch...willpower when it comes to chocolate!! emoticon

I used to be good at resisting!! But that was when i was alone in my house...when i didn't have any sweets in the house....when i didn't even go through the chocolate aisle at the store!!
But then my grandson and daughter moved back in.....(yeah sure blame it on them!!)

Truth is...there isn't that much candy/chocolate in the house...because my daughter doesn't care for it that much...and my grandson...well...if it is not in the house...he could care less too......

So what exactly is my problem???!!!

It's the comfort i feel when i indulge in the creamy taste of milk chocolate...
or think i feel!!

It's the 'oh i been good all day/week...why not have a candy bar!!!

It's the "not pre planning my meals and snacks"...and then when i get hungry driving to work (i have a long commute)....and having to stop for gas...the snickers...milky ways...twix's just seem to be everywhere!!

I am weak!!!! emoticon

BUT..... i will STOP it more 'being weak' and letting 'chocolate' overrule me!!! emoticon

So Dear Spark People: How many times can i start over??

Wait!! I already know the answer...As many times as it takes to get it right!!!

That is going to be my motto! This and of course Determination!!

Say it like you mean it: D..E..T..E..R..M..I..N..A..T..
.I...O...N!! emoticon emoticon

I can do this!! emoticon

I am NOT weak!!! emoticon

I will NOT fail!!! emoticon


Member Comments About This Blog Post:
ROZEEROZ1 6/26/2012 8:00AM

    Hi Taty, My response is 2 months after you wrote this blog. I am a choc-aholic. I had to treat my not being able to stop eating milk chocolate like it is an alcoholic addiction. If things stressed me out, I would go to the grocery store and buy 3 huge milk chocolate bars. Each a different flavour and down all 3 in less than 24 hours. Yes I say down them. It was almost like inhaling them. As I got older, I became fearful of becoming a diabetic and stopped.

Just like an alcoholic would do to stop I had to through out anything chocolate. When I went to the grocery store - I had to look straight ahead and not to either side of the clerk. Why because grocery stores know that that is the best place to put those chocolate bars. Daily I had to ask Jesus to help me to not eat chocolate. It took a bit of time to get rid of the craving and I have been away from chocolate for around 7+ years now. I don't miss chocolate at all At Christmas and Easter - that is when I had to stay away from those candy stores or even go close to their end of the mall. TV is another place they like to advertise around Christmas time and at Easter too. I warned people ahead of time not to serve me chocolates or give me chocolates for special occasions or for any occasion.

If I slipped up, I would confess my slip up to Jesus and ask Him to help me. I would start back at the beginning and not eat chocolate. For me to break my chocoholic habit as I said I had to treat it like it was an alcohol problem. Even magazines will advertise chocolates = I stayed away from reading magazines in doctors' offices. The first Christmas that I didn't eat chocolate, I had to write myself notes telling myself to stop eating chocolate. I pasted these notes on mirrors and carried them in my purse. When I felt a craving coming on, I read these notes. It worked for me. Everyone is different. Pray and ask Jesus to help you get rid of your chocolate cravings. He will help you if you want Him to.

HUGS Dorothy

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1BEACHWALKER 5/25/2012 3:14PM

    Yep--We aren't failures unless we just plain quit! Sounds like you know what to do! How are you doing now, since you haven't blogged in awhile?
Stay strong! emoticon

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DUSTYGIRL25 5/8/2012 7:05PM

    Well, you are not weak! Or a failure! Or anything else negative! What you are is human! Yes, let's just say that again H U M A N. Just like the rest of us. Now, I'm not a big candy fan, or particually a chocolate fan, but . . . I am a Big ICE CREAM fan. emoticon Yummmmm....! And that's my big weakness. And sometimes I eat way to many small bowels of the sweet stuff. But hey, this is all about learning to eat healthy and it's a learning process and learning takes time, Right??
OK, now that we've got that settled it's time to pat ourselves on the back for not eating something like Fried Butter (don't laugh, people are eating it at State Fairs).

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KARATE_KID 4/25/2012 8:15AM

    Chocolate is not your enemy.

Your body is not your enemy.

Guilt IS your enemy - don't allow your enemy into your house. Nobody is perfect - we all slip up with our plans; that's being human. Put it behind you and move on.

I love chocolate and I've learned that I CAN be satisfied with a little bit if I buy dark chocolate. It's much more satisfying than milk chocolate and doesn't set off a cycle of cravings. I work with a bunch of dietitians and it's very interesting that they all allow themselves little indulgences, while basically eating healthy. As one of them says often, "Life is meant to be lived, and food is meant to be enjoyed."


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CHATTIEGIRL 4/24/2012 10:27PM

    Hi Taty;

I gave up candy which is chocolate for lent and I didn't touch a drop and then after lent I started another challenge which was no sweets of any kind. I can stay strong and I love sweets but that is okay. God bless you always.

Smile Joyce

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MYYEAR7 4/20/2012 10:30PM

    Lucky for us there is no limit on the times we can start all over! Failed many times but still better off than if I had never tried! Good luck - and don't be hard on yourself.

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YENDUCHAKA 4/17/2012 11:25PM

    You must be the long lost twin sister I never knew I had! We have this uncanny connection when it comes to chocolate :-) Seriously, I could have written this blog (though mine wouldn't have had all the cool pics yours does). You're speaking my mind.

I didn't join the sweet tooth challenge because I was afraid. I knew I would fail, and didn't even try. I hope one day to have enough confidence in myself to at least try it, and keep trying until I become good at it like you are. You're an inspiration!

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VALLITTLEMAMA5 4/17/2012 11:04PM

    Is not doing chocolate about the cocoa or about the sugar? Glad I read this blog. . . I just opened a bag of semi-sweet chocolate chips. Maybe shouldn't have! Maybe you've inspired me to "pitch the baggage out!"

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LITTLEBO 4/12/2012 10:36PM

    Don't start over....don't think that way. You are on a journey, it is a process. Progress not pregression. I am a binge eater and sweet freak I eat one small sweet every morning with my breakfast protein. This has helped me very much.

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ABB698 4/12/2012 11:28AM

One thing you are NOT is have overcome things way harder than sugar cravings, so try, try and try can do anything!!! emoticon

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JERSEYGIRL24 4/11/2012 10:41AM


You are not weak willed. The odds are so stacked against you it is not funny. For some reason I enjoy reading books about eating habits (not diet books, but books that explain health problems and why we, as a nation, are so fat). One book that would really help you understand the situation is "The End of Overeating" by David Kessler. Someone on the Firecracker team (I can't remember who) mentioned this book, which is why I borrowed it from the library. It explains how processed foods, both those sold in restaurants and packaged foods sold in stores, are loaded with the "right" formula of sugar, fat and salt. This is done so that the consumer will want more, which of course translates into extra $$$ for the seller. I would highly recommend that you read this book. Borrow it from the library if you can. I am fortunate because my town belongs to a consortium of approximately 70 libraries with interlibrary borrowing privileges, and they will even send the book to my local library. I have definitely taken advantage of this and read lots of books on the subject. Not that it necessarily has translated into weight loss LOL.

I would also agree with Azclaire. Maybe the Tame Your Sugar Challenge is not for you. As I mentioned, I joined this challenge but I have not been following it. I do belong to another group, Sugar and Food Addiction. The team leader is very good. It is not a challenge group. You might want to check it out.

You've come so far Taty. I know you can do this. But above all, please don't beat yourself up. emoticon emoticon emoticon

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    You may not be able to go "cold turkey". You may need to wean yourself gradually off the chocolate.


You may have to quit eating chocolate just for today...instead of forever. And when necessary, quit eating chocolate just for the next hour, then the next, then the next, etc.

Do what you have to do. You are not a failure. And you have not failed. You just haven't officially started the challenge yet.

Just know you can do it!

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PRNCSCUP1-2FULL 4/10/2012 5:46PM

    All I can say is good for you! I just quit. I failed and just quit and said I'll start this one after Easter! I'm doing alright... But, right now I am weak! So, more power to ya! Use that determination for good! I'm proud of you!

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IGSBETH 4/10/2012 2:00PM

    I understand totally. I am going through the same thing.

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DRUIDPRINCESS 4/10/2012 1:34AM

    Giving up chocolate at Easter... hmmmm.... now what could be the problem here??? Luckily there are no limits to the restarts we are allowed... as long as we are still on this earth! But if your unhealthy choices are having a bad effect on your health, or if you look at your goals and realise that they are completely and unconditionally important to you, then it's time to stop with the comedy, the excuses, the procrastination...

I can hear that I am writing this to me, too, so I am sure there are so many of us going through the same challenges....

You are precious! You are awesome! You deserve a wonderful, long and healthy life, and a wonderful healthy body to live in, so let's do some SP reading, relook at our goals, get that serious committed stance, and let's kick that bad habit to the kerb!

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ROOSTER72 4/9/2012 10:23PM

    Easter was a tough time to try to do this.

My one piece of advice - don't start. That 'I'll just have a small piece" is the undoing of many. Once I start, I can't stop. So I have to not start.
The house has lots of chocolate since we are just coming down after Easter. We have a friend coming over for dinner tonight - and I am going to share a large egg after the meal . . . this will be tracked of course. I can then clean my teeth . . . no more chocolate.
I will not have any until then - because I wont be able to stop until it is all gone.

Plus, I threw out the really cheap horrid stuff. Not worth it.
Good luck!

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BRAVEONE92 4/9/2012 9:41PM

    That is what SP Members do, is start over
countless times. Otherwise, our choices
are to quit trying, give up. None of us want
to do this, so we keep trying and forgive
ourselves and move on. emoticon ,
start over, change from milk chocolate
to dark chocolate with less sugar. It melts
in your mouth & I now prefer it to milk c.
Some weeks, I have a small square every
day. Best Wishes Dear Friend.

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PAMMY222 4/9/2012 5:59PM

    You are in very good company! You have my permission to start over as many times as necessary. I too was a complete failure at curbing the chocolate cravings!!
I feel like a failure too, but I will start again today!! emoticon

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CLAIRE_LEFT_SP 4/9/2012 5:46PM

    I am you! (Take a look at my profile pic!) I stopped that challenge finally. The steps they want us to take just didn't match what was going on in my head.

I can't help feeling deprived. Right now, I read or listen or any other method to ramp up my resolve until I'm blue in the face and I haven't moved one iota from "I may learn to not eat it, but I'm always going to feel deprived." This is the correct head space to be in, but we can't force our feelings to change.

So, I've stopped trying to. There are so many things to improve in my lifestyle overall, I've decided I'll focus on other things and let this one be what it is. I'm definitely eating less sugar because, having acknowledged that I'm going to eat some, I'm able to eat a smaller something. And I'm reading the labels - do I want a Snickers or 3 Muskateers? - and choosing the less bad one.

Any bit we don't eat is a victory for those of us who feel a strong addiction. It's a long road taken step by step and you have momentum building on lots of fronts. Keep on keepin' on!

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JR0124 4/9/2012 5:33PM

    I am the type of person who will eat everything that I shouldn't if I tell myself I "Can't have that". What if you got a few lower calorie chocolate snacks to have at night. I used to have a Hershey's stick every night when I was trying to move past the addiction. Sorry, I can only find an amazon link:

If you work it into your calories for the day you can have it so you don't feel deprived and it doesn't make you get into that "well I already screwed up so I might as well eat a lot" mindset.

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JULIEANNCAN 4/9/2012 5:20PM

    My Dear Friend - I wish you all the success imaginable if you truly want to achieve this goal. I still haven't heard anyone else who has heard about the connection of sugar and cancer though. I would still like the information if you have it! :)

I have chosen to either have a protein bar with chocolate in it or a protein drink that's chocolate almost daily in part to obviously get protein I need because I'm a vegetarian and in part to moderate my eating sweets and also to feel satisfied. While that works for me, I understand others (like you) wanting something different. I wish you all the best! emoticon

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JSALERNO 4/9/2012 3:34PM

    You can do it. You need to keep healthy alternatives. I eat chocolate whips yogurt from yoplait.

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WATERMELLEN 4/9/2012 3:32PM

    Great blog!! We've all been there . . . . and will be there again, most likely! I have to keep reminding myself: if I've bought it, I intend to eat it (no matter what I'm telling myself).

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    Of course you can do it!!!

And by the way, you were set up this past weekend... Easter candy production is second only to halloween!

BUT, it's behind you. One moment at a time, one choice at a time, you can succeed!

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RUNNINGOMA 4/9/2012 3:22PM

    I think there is a connection to "I can't have___________" that makes us want it more. We are rebellious by nature!
Now, if it was on the diet and you had to eat it everyday, then maybe you wouldn't want it?
You know what? Getting back up is where the success is! Quitting is not in the equation. Find your balance.
I have decided that I can't eat in the car. (at least not when I am driving - especially when I am coming home from grocery shopping - that ends up being food that I am hiding - and it is NOT good.) I think I read that in bookworm's blog and realized I had to stop that.
Okay - binge over? On the wagon again! Put that halo back in place! emoticon

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SEEMAINE 4/9/2012 3:03PM

    Oh dear friend. I've been there too and I feel your pain. Do we allow ourselves some in moderation or are we so controlled by it that we have to swear off of it forever and go cold turkey? Those are two questions that I struggle with constantly. I know you're strong and what you set your mind to, you'll achieve! I know that having lots of stress in our lives "leads" us to (fill in the blank) and all I can say is to try one choice at a time, because you can always start over on the next choice. My prayers are always there! Love you!

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MAMASUDS 4/9/2012 2:49PM

    All I could think of was the VegieTales song, "The bunny,the bunny. I ate the bunny."

here is hope! You can do it!

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GOTTHATFIRE 4/9/2012 2:48PM

    Cheer up, SparkFriend. You are cognizant of where you're falling short and intend to do something about it. I can't give suggestions based on my experience because I'm more like your daughter in the sense of not liking chocolate very much. But I did find what I think will be two helpful articles on the subject. One is from SparkPeople:
The other, I found online:
ravings. I can tell you from experience though that starting over keeps me either standing still or going backwards. I made a commitment to move forward because I know that I will like where I end up more than where I am now. emoticon too!

Comment edited on: 4/9/2012 2:49:08 PM

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