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    WATOGA17   180,557
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Thursday, April 05, 2012

I am writing to fill you all in on what is happening in my life at the present time. Last week we learned that my husband has cancer - again. About four years ago my husband was diagnosed with squamous cell cancer above his left eye. Squamous cell cancer is easily treated if it is caught early and treated properly. While Craig's was caught early, it was not treated properly. He was given a cream to use on the lump that is only to be used on Basal cell cancer. When the cancer got worse he was sent to have surgery. Several weeks post-surgery a lump began to grow under his incision. He returned to the surgeon who pronounced it "not cancerous". We went merrily along thinking that it was fine, when it suddenly grew in size. Craig decided to see a new dermatologist who left his office to bring in a Mohs surgeon who had an office in his building. That surgeon declared that his lump was definitely cancerous and "too involved"for him to even touch and advised that we go immediately to Johns Hopkins Hospital immediately.

We went to JHU where my husband had Mohs surgery, three years ago last Christmas. Even then, with some of the world's best surgeons, it was very difficult. The surgeon actually stopped midway through surgery to come tell me that it was much worse than expected and that they were currently "just trying to save his eye". This was being done in an outpatient surgery center and they had realized that it was so bad that it should have been done under anesthesia. However, at that point, the cancer had not all been removed and had now been invaded by the surgery and the removal needed to be completed and the problem was being able to do it in a way that my husband could tolerate. They were using local anesthesia and pain killers in what turned out to be major surgery. They ordered more pain killers, used more local anesthesia and I gave him a pep talk (about using the tools we women use to get through labor, etc.) He got through it but just barely and became delirious on the drive home.

My husband had another lump develop several months ago and a new doctor (new insurance) told him that it wasn't cancerous. I know it sounds stupid as I write this, but we believed it. In the past month, the lump has grown a lot. Last week he saw the doctor again who declared it to be cancer and said he needed surgery ASAP. We received a call on Monday to be at a surgical center on Tuesday morning. We were there eager to have this taken care of. The surgeon examined it an refused to operate. He attempted to make some noises that meant it wasn't a terrible situation, but we came away believing that this is a pretty terrible situation.

The doctor wanted a consult with a head and neck surgeon and a CT scan. It has now turned into a consult with two other surgeons and a PET scan of the neck and carotid artery. I saw the surgeon examine my husband's neck when we were there. Now I believe that he felt something in his exam.

Needless to say, we are terrified. We are trying to stay positive for ourselves, each other and our kids. We are also trying to keep this news from our daughter who is in China doing study abroad for 5 months and has only been gone for 7 weeks.

Please send your thoughts, prayers, good vibes, etc. our way. We are grateful for all of it.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TRICIALICI 5/10/2012 9:31PM

    I just happened to stop by your sparkpage to see how you were doing, and noticed the title "Cancer." I was so sorry to read of your husband's health challenges. I hope things are going well with his treatment. I will definitely pray for you both! Let me know how things are going for the two of you. Take care! emoticon

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1TRULYBLESSED 4/22/2012 2:23PM

    Jen, I'm so sorry that you and your husband have had such a horrible experience with incompetent doctors and a devastating disease! I've added you to my prayer list and am here for you when you need to vent.
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SANDYDOLLAR201 4/10/2012 7:21AM

    Sorry Jen to hear of this news. Praying that your husband can get the proper treatment he needs and have the best care available.

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EXQUISITEDEE 4/9/2012 2:14PM

    Im so sorry to hear about your husband. You are both in my prayers. emoticon

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RHONDALYN10 4/7/2012 6:14PM

Continue to keep you both in prayers.

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JMCADE 4/7/2012 4:08PM


I know how frightening this is and I am praying full out for you as you have for me in the past.

Please be sure to keep all members of your family in the loop as they want to be there to help. We left our son from the knowledge of his niece's condition that quickly went bad and he did not have the oppotunity to see her before things got bad.

Though the stress on all is not good the not knowing canbe worse. May your decision to keep your daughter out of the loop very carefully.


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BEACHMOM77 4/7/2012 3:36PM

    Sending lots of prayers your way..

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NEWNAC304 4/6/2012 3:46PM

    Jen - I am so sorry that you are going through this. Cancer one time is bad enough, but to have to deal with it twice must be horrible. I am a firm believer in that God doesn't give you more than you can handle. Try to stay strong and remember to take care of yourself so you can take care of Craig. I wish I was closer so I could do more to help you but know that I am thinking of you. emoticon

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-COURT- 4/6/2012 1:38PM

    it is terrible when we can't trust our docrors. my fil was at his heart doctor. x-ray showed something, but doc said he didn't think it serious. months later he died of lung cancer.
prayers for your husband to get proper diagnosis and treatment.

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AEHEGE 4/6/2012 12:04PM

    Jen, I am so sorry to hear this news. I understand your being fearful and anxious, especially in light of your past experience. What others have said is so true. You are the rock here and need to stay strong. My thoughts and prayers are for you in this respect.
Also, consider what Caseytalk said about telling Hana. I know that she would want to be kept in the loop. You will know how much to divulge.
Blessings and strength to you.

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GOLOPTIOUS 4/6/2012 10:49AM


You're in my thoughts.

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CHOCSUNDAE 4/6/2012 9:38AM

    You are in my thoughts and prayers!! God bless you both!!

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KOPSBABY 4/6/2012 7:31AM

    Staying positive is most of the battle. When people are given a diagnosis like this it's the hardest thing to do but if you keep positive thoughts you've got a 100% better chance of surviving the situation than someone that just gives up. Keep strong, Craig and your children need you to be their rock. Prayers and hugs go out to all of you.

Have a Blessed Easter.

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BEFIT014 4/6/2012 6:36AM

    I am SO emoticon for what you must be going through. I can't even imagine it. You must be so angry at the 1st doctor.

I'll keep you both in my thoughts & prayers!

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TWINKS55 4/5/2012 11:26PM

    You and Craig have been through so much. I would imagine that it is hard to face this road again. I can understand the fear that is with you right now. Try to look at things as one step / hurdle at a time. Prayers are there for you, Craig, and your family.


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CASEYTALK 4/5/2012 11:11PM

    Oh, how horrible! I can't imagine what you're going through. Take good care of YOURSELF so that you can take good care of him.

Please reconsider your decision not to tell your daughter. I have lived away from my family in different countries all my life. One of the most frightening things that happened to me was when I was in Bulgaria in the mid eighties. Back then, we didn't have e-mail. I received a letter from my mother, dated 4 months before, that said something along the lines of, "I'm out of ICU now. Whatever it was with my heart doesn't seem to be showing up anymore." It was the FIRST I was hearing that something was wrong with my mother's health. I waited until evening to call so I wouldn't wake them up (time zones) and the entire wait I let myself panic more and more. What if she had died? What if she's back in the hospital? What if it's serious? When I finally reached her on the phone, it turned out that she was fine. "We didn't want to worry you." was what she said.

My opinion? I'm an adult, and I have a right to worry if there's something wrong with my parent's health.

It took me a long time before I could trust them to tell me if something was wrong and in the meantime, I couldn't stop worrying if something were wrong and they just weren't telling me. Yes, that's right -- I ended up worrying MORE because I didn't know.

I have children now and I do understand the desire to shield them, I really do, but this is information you need to give her. She'll cope. She'll cope much better than if, God forbid, your husband's condition worsens and she finds out you weren't telling her what was going on. She needs to be able to tell her dad that she loves him and is sending good thoughts his way.



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MGJARVI 4/5/2012 10:16PM

    HUGS Jen, I know you're scared, but try your best to stay on the positive side (for you AND him), lots of prayers are coming your way.

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    My husband and I have both had Mohs surgery and I am having a second in the next couple of weeks but it sounds like you have a more difficult journey ahead. I am absolutely sending good thoughts and prayers and bit of fairydust your way for you, your family and the specialists who will need a gift and all our prayers....Hugs, Kal

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SKINNYMINIME22 4/5/2012 9:29PM

    Jen, I'm so sorry to hear about this. Sending hugs and positive thoughts your way.

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FT4EVR 4/5/2012 9:14PM

    Sending hugs and prayers! I hope you will get some answers soon. The unkown is so stressful. Thinking of you!

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FITNFUNJEN 4/5/2012 9:05PM

    I'm so sorry to hear about this and am sending prayers your way! I unfortunately have dealt with my fair share of incompetent doctors when dealing with my mother's cancer. May you find peace, comfort, and some great doctors!

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CHOCOHOLIC2276 4/5/2012 8:15PM

    I am so sorry for what is going on in your life and I am praying for your husband's health and your family. May God provide a healing hand and offer strength and comfort to all of you.


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MAUITN 4/5/2012 7:52PM

    Jen, I continue to pray for you and Craig and the that the doctors are able to determine the best possible treatment.

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YAMAHA49 4/5/2012 7:37PM

    I am so sorry you are having to deal with this. Conflicting diagnoses are so hard to experience because the very people you are supposed to trust lead you astray and you feel blind-sided. This happened with my sister who received an erroneous diagnosis of a Langerhans sarcoma. It is so devastating and leaves you mistrustful of any future doctors. I will pray for your husband and your family especially at Easter services on Sunday...
Yasha emoticon

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