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    OWELETTE   1,492
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I'm alive!

Monday, April 02, 2012

I've not totally disappeared from spark, but I'm having an issue with my bipolar disorder and have a HUGE amount of schoolwork.
Did I mention my therapist is in Mexico and I haven't seen a proper psychiatrist yet? I'm on a waiting list...

I've been feeling increasingly down since last Wednesday. It's really affected my exercising-okay, almost completely stopped it, and I just want to sleep.
I have an incredible amount of school work to do and I feel like I'm spiraling into nothingness.
I'm not sure if I'm depressed or having a mixed episode.
This week I've tried to break up with my girlfriend, wrote a 6 page paper when 3 pages were necessary, and can't even focus on math.

Yeah, this is a pretty thrilling ride I'm on right now.
So I'm trying to focus the little energy I have into improving as much as I can right now. I'm plugging away at bits of schoolwork every day, and I'm trying to get -back- into exercising. I think I'm going to do 30 minutes of yoga tonight. I'm very angry with myself for not exercising, because I know it would improve how I feel, but I just can't make myself do it. I can barely scrape myself up to work.
I'm so disappointed-it seems like I get everything working, and then I break down on myself. :(
Ah, well, things will be better in a few weeks.

Oh! I rescued two EXTREMELY beat up Eclipse catfish-they were in a 40 gallon tank with another large fish, and had no where to hide, so they were continually rolling on top of each other and trying to hide behind each other.
One of these fish is 7 inches long, and the other is about 9, so they were really damaging each other. They have scrapes and scars from rubbing each other with their pointed pectoral fins. Their fins are torn and missing in places. One fish is missing a pectoral fin almost completely...poor guys.
Good news though! I moved them into my 120 gallon and they are so happy...they swim back and forth with each other and are so active. They seem really healthy despite their physical appearance. Spending time with them makes me happy. It's nice to see that I helped something get better. emoticon
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SKINNYHANDFUL 4/3/2012 7:32AM

    Aren't fish great? I'm glad you were able to take in the catfish. Many fish die at the store from the stress levels. (I have a 75 gallon tank and I just love it. I brought home two striped Raphael catfish yesterday and they are sooo cute.) Sometimes helping out something or someone less fortunate that we are can make us count our blessings, or reinforces that we do have something positive to offer, in your case, a safe clean home for two lovely catfish :) What a warm heart you have!

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TRULYVISIBLE 4/3/2012 12:56AM

  Hope your mood improves and you start to feel better. I like that you rescued those fishes, I never liked seeing fishes in tanks too small for them. What a wonderful thing you did! I looked at your pictures and your cat looks just like mine. Same color in fur and eyes. Mine is a Burmese.


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