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Scientists discover miracle weight loss food.

Sunday, April 01, 2012

Three Silos, South Dakota. April 1, 2012. (Associated Press)

A startling discovery was announced today by scientists working in the Food Science Department of the University of Northwest South Dakota.

"Previously off-limit foods for dieters have been discovered to actually hasten the weight loss process" said lead researcher Dr. Anita Mann. "But, ONLY if eaten in the right combinations" she added.

"Really, we had no idea that this would be the result of our experiments. We were as startled as anyone" said Dr. Mann.

Initially the scientists began by pairing foods long known to be high in sugars, fats, and calories to see if there were any unusual or unexpected interactions.

Long thought to be "no-no" foods for dieters, the scientists discovered that if bacon and chocolate ice cream were eaten together, they actually require more calories to digest than the foods contain. Thus eating the two foods in combination causes the body to lose weight. The more one eats, the more weight one loses.

"For the effect to work, the two foods must be combined in every single bite" said lead researcher Mann.

Only certain brands of ice cream were found to be effective. These included the so-called premium brands with the highest fat contents.

"One would think that low-fat ice cream would be more effective, but we found the opposite to be true" said Dr. Mann.

Local and national health authorities are very interested in the results and are designing follow-up studies with an eye towards clinical trials as soon as 2015.

"Soon obesity will be a thing of the past" predicted Dr. Mann.


Member Comments About This Blog Post:
JOANNANOW 4/10/2012 10:50AM

    Funny boy! emoticon emoticon

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FRANCESCANAZ 4/3/2012 3:12PM


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NEILITHICMAN 4/2/2012 8:36PM

    Maybe combine the two to create bacon icecream, yum yum yum can't get enough of that salty goodness.

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JOL1KEY2BOL3 4/1/2012 7:37PM


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CELLISTA1 4/1/2012 6:00PM

    Did you ever see Woody Allen's "Sleepers," where he finds out that red meat and cigarettes are actually good for you? Loved this!

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TMW54812 4/1/2012 4:00PM

    Thanks for sharing this wonderful news! I always knew there had to be a way to eat the new Ben & Jerry flavor, chocolate &bacon supream, without gaining weight. emoticon

Comment edited on: 4/1/2012 4:01:43 PM

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HGSGUY 4/1/2012 1:00PM

    Haha, I want to live in that world!

Have a great April!

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SUZYMOBILE 4/1/2012 12:10PM

    I've been "had" twice today already. A third time would've been too much! Very clever!!

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TAICHIDANCER 4/1/2012 11:03AM

    @TEDDYTEDDY, no I didn't. Read the first letter of each paragraph!

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MISSG180 4/1/2012 11:03AM

    emoticon I win at last!!!! emoticon

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TEDDYTEDDY 4/1/2012 11:01AM

    You forgot the punch line...APRIL FOOLS!!!! emoticon

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CHIFANG130 4/1/2012 10:59AM

    Your mean fat + fat actually makes you burn more fat? Sounds too good to be true.

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KELPIE57 4/1/2012 10:58AM

    To quote, two positives cannot make a negative... aye, right! emoticon

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REDSHOES2011 4/1/2012 10:53AM


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CURLSUSIEQ 4/1/2012 10:52AM

    that is just too weird! wow. emoticon

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KAYOTIC 4/1/2012 10:52AM


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