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    LINIS_THIN   11,147
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junkie

Thursday, March 22, 2012

I'm sitting here in front of a delicious slice of caramel fudge cheesecake considering my ways.

Its not like I did not give my conscience a good chance to talk me out of it.
I did.

Its not like I have never done this before. Not like I don't know food changes nothing but your weight. But once again I convinced myself to buy the cake.

It was so sad that I had to come back from months of absence just to blog about it.

I feel like a strung out junkie lying in the drain I fell into after my drunken stupor.
Now I'm sober and feeling stupid.

You see I bought a rich and delicious brownie just half hour ago but it did not drown the pain.
I had cheesecake yesterday too. *shame*

The why I'm doing this to myself matters little.

But since u asked, mom is in a hospice dying of cancer and suffice it to say I'm not coping well.
Although exactly what I'm not coping with may surprise you! But let's leave that for another blog.

Thanks to deciding to blog I did not finish the cheesecake.

For now that's victory enough.

Soon I'll update you all on all I've been up to since u last heard from me.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KATHRYN1955 3/23/2012 10:57AM

    Don't be too hard on yourself with the food right now. You have enough to endure with your mom's declining health.
Take care, and glad to see you back.
Kathy
emoticon emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 3/23/2012 10:58:54 AM

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-POOKIE- 3/23/2012 9:32AM

    Im sorry to hear this news, please remember we are hear if you need to talk x

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NELLIEC 3/23/2012 12:24AM

    I am sorry to hear about your mom. I will be praying for you and that she is not in pain.

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TRYINGHARD1948 3/22/2012 7:29PM

    It is a hard time and really brings home to us the fragility of life. Do take care of yourself, blessings. emoticon

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LESSOFPMCD 3/22/2012 5:02PM

    I'm so sorry to hear about your mom - it must be an extremely trying time for you.

Don't beat yourself up too much - sometimes your emotions have to win out.

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PICKIE98 3/22/2012 4:02PM

    IMHO, you did the right thing,, how about walking over to the neighbor's house and knocking on the door and handing them the cheesecake..
two winners for the price of one!

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