Monday, March 19, 2012
I'm ashamed to admit that I have been binge eating sweets almost nonstop every night since I started work. In 10 days, I've gained back 4 pounds (and I was surprised that it was only 4 pounds with the way I've been eating).
I'm having a really hard time adjusting to my new schedule...I'm exhausted when I get home and I have had trouble sleeping all the way through the night. Although everyone at work has been super nice and very patient, I feel very anxious and nervous at work. I feel like I have to prove myself as smart and nice every second I'm there. It is EXHAUSTING making small "get to know you" conversation with my coworkers and answering their 21 personal questions about where I'm from, my family situation, where I live, what I do after work, etc. I know they're just trying to be friendly, but since I haven't worked in almost 3 years, I haven't been around people on a regular basis. I feel bombarded and cornered, and honestly, I feel pressure to fit in like I'm some high school kid again. It's very weird to 'hope people like me' at my age.
Anyway, my eating has been completely out of control and it has been super hard to get back on track. I'm praying every day for strength and determination.