This is by far my favorite article that I have read here so far. Today I had to go back and read over it again because lately I've felt like I've been slipping back into the "victim" mentality and wanted to get a grip on things before they got out of hand again.
If by chance, this article has passed you by, I ask you to give it a few minutes and read it or save it and read when you have time. This article is 4 pages, but it's a fast read because it's truly an eye opener. It leaves you wanting more...and VOILA...you get more. This is just step 1 in SparkPeople's Mind Over Body series, a 10-step program to end emotional eating and creating a permanent healthy lifestyle.
This article," Putting the I back into Your Vocabulary" www.sparkpeople.com/reso
end emotional eating and creating a permanent healthy lifestyle by Dean Anderson.
The Author starts off by saying that "knowing the answer to one simple question could improve your chances for weight loss success by up to 100%"
(my inner negative voice's response)...here we go again.
So what is this question? We all wanna know! Well, it is simple, He say starting all of your sentences with the pronoun "I".
(my inner negative voice's resonse)...Hmmm I was taught that you should never-or very rarely start your sentences with "I", that it was rude. Maybe that only applies to writing and not inner talk?
The Author explains that by doing this we are taking responsibility for our decisions and dealing with the consequences of our decisions. He goes into some depth in the subject and gives examples so it make sense to me and I'm able to understand immediately what he was trying to tell me.
(me) Ohhh...lightbulb moment! I've always heard about this notion of being responsible and accepting consequences and I thought I was but now see that I really wasn't at least 3/4 of the time.
Basically when people make excuses for what they know they need to be doing we aren't using the pronoun "I" in the excuses were using. It's the helpless thinking of a victim.
(me)...(hand held high) GUILTY...
This article explains that when you use "I", it defines your excuses more accurately rather than putting the blame onto something else and you also bring the only realistic solution to your problem into sight.
I immediately realized that I could put this to use in all of the areas of my life. I realized a few things along the way after using the "I" pronoun:
1. I'm really good at the helpless thinking of a victim and really didn't realize it at least most of the time...I was aware of it at times.
2. Wow, it was really easy to build the foundation and change my way of thinking and talking to myself. I didn't expect too much from myself before I read this and implemented it into my life.
3. I can now "smell" an excuse a mile away! (watch out kiddies)
4. I feel awakened and empowered and I feel great about myself, even though I didn't feel bad about myself before. But I have went to at least 2 years of therapy working on filtering my thinking and didn't feel like I got very far at all. I feel like I have a secret weapon that I can pull out AND I know how to use it!
5. Anytime I start to come up with some type of an excuse-even a legitimate one, I stop and re-word my inner talk and realize that I totally have control over this if I want. Even if I have to juggle and work a little bit to get it done. If even after all of that I realize I still can't do it, I just tell myself that it was my decision.
It would go something like this...I've decided that it's more important to go to the kid's spur of the moment ball game and spend an extra 20 mins at the gym tomorrow. This sentence replaces one I would previously use that would go something like this...I can't go to the gym today because I have to go to the kid's game. It might not seem like that big of a deal but it's huge and it's empowering. You are telling yourself that you are the boss over yourself, so here you have made the choice and also came up with a resolution by promising yourself you will do 20 extra minutes in the gym tomorrow. And when you make a decision it's your choice, not someone or somebody else's.
He has a writing assignment that you can use. I've set up a paper to do this and have completed one paper for "my reason for making bad food choices" and taken pictures of the the paper through the stages of me doing the assignment. I'm going to post those tomorrow so you have a change to read the article, I don't want to be a spoiler.
Here are some other issues that I'm going to do the writing assignment on:
why is there dog hair everywhere?
why I'm not getting to the gym on the days that I promised myself I would go
Why I'm not working out (at home) if I don't make it to the gym
Why is that room upstairs still cluttered (I mean really cluttered)
Why am I not walking my dog especially when I have it added to my personal goals
Why am I not going to bed on my previously agreed on bedtime? Therefore causing me to sleep in longer that I also previously agreed on.
I could probably think of many more but that's a pretty good start for now. I hope this helps some of you that have commented on needing motivation for exercise and will power.