Binge coping: a new trick

Thursday, March 08, 2012

I binged. I'm not going to tell you what or how many calories because it really doesn't matter. I ate past the point of satiation when I wasn't really hungry to begin with, and it was enough of a "mistake" to affect my health. I also overate to the point of illness yesterday.

So what do I do? Do I exercise like mad, even though my stomach is upset and I have a sugar-headache? Do I restrict my calories tomorrow? Skip dinner tonight? Practice a fast? All these ideas instantly ran through my head. I started to look around for help.

A website said, "Make sure you eat after a binge." Counter-intuitive, I know. They mean, make sure you get right back on the healthy schedule. But something else clicked with me. I thought about how I shame myself and how I hurt myself, and how binge-eating, for me, is intended to hurt myself. I eat to the point of pain. I eat foods I don't even particularly like (such as ketchup) to overstimulate and numb my palate. I don't eat for joy or pleasure or satisfaction.

So why not treat myself to a gorgeous, healthy, pricey meal after a binge? Why not give myself a gift? Why not try the exact opposite of my previous reactions and be gentle this time?

Before I go to my book club tonight I am stopping by a vegan place that I've always wanted to visit. They are a little expensive ($$ on yelp!) but that will make the experience stick better. I deserve to be healthy. I deserve healthy, good, delicious food and I deserve to love eating it. I don't deserve half-cold, hastily consumed left-overs. I deserve food made with love, grown with love, and recognizable in its forms.
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  • FUNGIRL81005
    I think you may have it right.....Instead off continue to binge and feel horrible. You get right back on track and give your body real good natural food. Way to go!!
    2206 days ago
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