Thursday, March 08, 2012
I had a job interview today. It would be a big change if I go with it...but it sounds ideal, like something I would love and while it would likely mean leaving my current job eventually, I am liking the sound of it.
My interview was via skype, which meant looking at myself through the camera of my computer. And I noticed my face is looking thinner. And when I say that, what I mean is that I look more like myself and less like the bloated version of myself that I'd turned into.
To test skype for my job interview, I chatted with my very BFF...who has been undergoing some challenging times with PTSD after an accident with a drunk driver.
She said: "the worst part is that I haven't felt like myself." And she shared with me how God has blessed her in her adversity to become a more compassionate person and that she is growing through her trials.
And I wished I could be there to hug her, because I've been going through the same thing for the past few years. And seeing myself in the skype camera...feeling my body on the treadmill and waking up in the morning...singing in the choir at church...praying prayers that don't bounce off the ceiling....all of that makes me feel like me. It connects me with the person I am who I'd somehow lost track of.
And so I see another purpose to the pain of these years: I am able to stand a few steps ahead of my very dearest friend and promise her that she will get herself back. That God will restore that to her. And that I know because I have been there and seen it happen to me.