Hi again. For those who haven't properly been introduced to me, I am Mary. I have a husband and two stepsons. I have a crazy life and sometimes, I am just plain crazy. But I like to have fun and laugh and even cry sometimes. But lately, I have been feeling quite bluck in life.

I don't want to bore you with the details but that might help a little. A little over two years ago, I started having some health issues. I didn't feel like doing a lot and just sat on the couch and my already existing weight problem got worse. So then a year ago I had surgery for the problem and well it didn't get much better. I had let the situation go to the point where my body was just tired and didn't have what it needed to heal. Well I sat on the couch for another year. So, my weight climbed even higher.

Several months ago my feet and legs started swelling. My shoes didn't feel good on my feet because of the swelling. My feet were screaming to take them off but I had to wear them to work. I was really starting to get concerned. Around the same time, I went to the grocery store with my husband and my back felt like it was going break. I couldn't believe that I couldn't walk all the way thru without feeling like that. I was hurting and tired and just wanted to go sit down somewhere. Wasn't very happy at all. You would think that would be the wake up call a normal person would need to make a change. NOPE, not me. So I just struggled right along.

I was getting ready for work the other morning and I went to put on my socks and shoes and, oh dear, I couldn't. My husband had to help me. I was mortified. I couldn't believe that I could not do the basic necessity of putting on my own socks and shoes to go to work. What kind of person lets themself go there? Me, thats who and I wasn't proud. And then I had a doctor's appointment a few days later. Well we all know that means a date with the scale. When I saw 399, I almost had a heart attack right there. That was a really hard time for me. I thought to myself, and this a real truth here, I am so depressed now, I need some chocolate. I finally said to myself, "Self, that chocolate got your big tail here to begin with." So I decided it was time to make a change. So I am back. I need my Spark.

Also, I have been watching the series My 600-lb Life. Wow, that show has been an eye opener. The struggles and the way they have fought to lose the weight. But I have to feel that some of the attitudes just weren't there. I think two of them possibly. But I shall not judge. They are a much bigger success story than I am. Hats off to them. I hope someday to be half the success they have been. I have the desire. I don't think its really to be skinny and all its all about health and being able to do things I can't right now. My first goal, to tie my shoes without having to role all over the bed to do it, ha ha ha.

I am excited. I hope everyone will join the journey with me. Hope you have a good week.